SASc - EP249 - Barbie Blank aka Kelly Kelly

Transcript

Thank you for listening to this podcast, wine production now available on Apple Podcasts, Podcasts, one, Spotify and anywhere else you get your podcasts. This week's group therapy is sponsored by China at Brand China. Brand makes premium disposable tableware for all life's gatherings. Visit my China Netcom to find out more. Apartment Second The most popular place to find a place GEICO, go to Kayak.com, get a quote and see how much you could save. It's Geico easy. Visit Geico.com today. That's Geico.com Talkspace. If you need a little support to help you through the end of the year or want to start building towards a better upcoming year, Talkspace is here to help. Matched with a licensed therapist, when you go to talk Spacecom and get $100 off your first month with the promo code Wine and Native, keep the sense of the season when you go to native's limited time holiday scented deodorants. Go to native deodorant dot com and use code bind to get 20 percent off your first purchase at checkout. All right, Vinous, quick pause on the pod before we get into this week's group therapy. Not sure if you know this, but it's November already and there are some pretty big holidays coming up. I'm doing everything there is to prep a Mayan, but one thing that makes my life so much easier and the holiday season or pretty much any time I'm entertaining and hosting people is China brand. China brand is a people focused brand that offers premium disposable tableware for all of life's get togethers. Whether you need plates or cups, cutlery, napkins, table covers or all of the above. China really does provide everything you need when you're gathering, especially if you're the one hosting because they make it so easy to clean up. Clean up is truly never been easier. They offer products like their China Classic, China Crystal and China Comfort, so you can find anything you need, whether you're going after a little elegant look or you need some capsule sleeves for the warm drinks. There's no Benz leaks, and they're made with at least 80 percent recycled materials. We'd love to hear it. Make sure you stock up for whatever get togethers you might have coming your way. Visit my China Netcom to find out more with our TV. PodcastOne Presents Off the Vine, Grape Therapy, Kaitlyn Bristowe is going to answer your question. Drink to your confession and hear what you have to say about anything, Bachelor. Let's shake it up some more. Here's Kaitlyn. Welcome to a group therapy. I'm your host. Kaitlyn Bristowe. Your session is now starting, OK? When I found out that this incredible singer songwriter was also a huge Bachelor fan. I knew I had to have him on for a recap ASAP, and I'm so glad I did. And then I found out that he's Canadian, too, and I was like, OK, well, this is just meant to be. You probably found yourself listening to if the world was ending. You come over a lot this past year. I mean, it was nominated for a freaking Grammy. Very timely. And all of his other amazing, authentic music that just frickin pulls at my heartstrings every time I listen. JP Saxe and I talk all about his career, the meaning behind his music, especially at track number five. You know, you know how he got into the Bachelor world and what he's thinking about this season and this week's episode. I had a really, really great conversation with him. I think you guys are really going to like this one. It was so much fun. Enjoy. Hi. Hi. Nice to meet you. So nice to meet you. You're still a fellow Canadian. I am a fellow Canadian. Where did you grow up in Toronto? OK, I grew up in Alberta, Rio, Canada, which may explain. I agree, but explain. Well, you know, there's growing up in Toronto and Vancouver, and then there's growing up in Canada, Canada. Yeah, I agree. Toronto Vancouver feels like a smaller New York or L.A.. Exactly. I've never been to Alberta, but I'm touring there in February for the first time, and I'm so excited. Oh, that's OK. Are you going to like Edmonton, Calgary? Yeah, exactly. You'll pass through my hometown, which is the Duke, which is like a small, little sad town that's between Red Deer and Edmonton. But you probably won't have time then to go visit. Like for Jasper. Hey ! Probably not, but I'm hoping to see the northern lights because I've never seen them. I also think there's got to be some Canada points for touring Alberta in February. Yeah, yeah, you got to bring your like tuk in your parka. The tuk exactly. Tuk is a giveaway for my Canadian this. I forget that that's not a word people use in California. I know I do it all the time still. How long have you been in the states for almost 10 years? Oh well, s**t, you really have no excuse. You know, I was surprised how many Canadians are integrated into the Bachelor world. It's kind of like the music industry. Canadians quietly running the show. Yes, it's true. Wait, wait, there's a rumor I cannot confirm or deny that Clayton is the next bachelor. Why do I think he's Canadian? No, he's not. Is he? I literally said that to the touring squad 30 minutes ago. No. And so I was watching the newest episode and I just kept looking at clean. I was like, This guy gives me a heavy bachelor vibes. Oh, he does. He definitely has the like the bachelor look that they usually go for, you know, the all-American football guy. It's so interesting, though, because if he is the Bachelor, they really have not been giving him that like bath filler edit that would make you, like, really fall in love with him before he goes on to his own season. So I'm very curious. Mm-Hmm. I mean, we'll see what happens next, but he definitely is the Bachelor job bachelor job. Yeah, that chiseled Bachelor. Well. Fair enough. What is this little dinosaur you got on your bed? That's adorable. Yeah, it was a fan gift and it was. We were using it in a video earlier and I decided to just leave it there. It's as emotional support bear on it, but it's like an emotional support raptor, I think. I think it's because I'm a big raptors, and I think that's where where it started. Oh, that makes sense. OK, that makes sense. I love that you just have it propped up on your bed. That's really cute. OK? I also read somewhere that you were 14 when you wrote your first song and like, I'm trying to think about where my brain was when I was 14 and it was literally like, I have a crush on a boy, and then I go to ballet class like, What have you always just been this like, like deep human being that could just right? Is it just in your blood? Like, what are you writing about at 14? I mean, it wasn't all that different from what you just described. Okay. The first song I ever wrote is an embarrassing name, but just keep in mind I was 14 years old. The first song was called I'm Just Too Me to Have You. I kind of like that, you know, it's not inconsistent with the songs I am writing now. It's not to 14. Yeah, I was. I was introspective as s**t. Even then, I was just, you know, I was such a nerdy kid, right? Like, being a sensitive singing ginger is far less cool when you're 14 than when you're 28. I have come into my own in this era of my life, where all of the things that you got made fun of as a man for when you were in high school are now the things that everyone is looking for. Isn't that interesting? I I always love like the comeback story of a nerd in school because those are always the ones that like, you're like the real people who have depth and you're like, OK, high school, whatever. Watch what I'm going to do later in life, and I feel like that's what matters. Like all the people, you know, when you go to like your high school reunion and the people that you really thought were like the it people, the cool, popular people. And then the nerds like, I'll come back with great jobs and they're like, so happy and married and living out their dreams. And then the cool people are like, they don't even show up sometimes. I love it. No, I couldn't agree more. I think what it takes to succeed in high school is very different than what it takes to succeed in life. And also, like throughout high school and my late teenage years, most of my friends were women. I was just such a sense that I've always been such a sensitive human, and I love talking about my feelings and s**t. I've always loved it. But over the last, like three or four years now, I just have this squad of really emotionally intelligent men who are equally a part of like my friend family. And it took us, but I'm happy to be there in life I've had. I'm happy to have arrived at that kind of community. Yeah, yeah, I love that it's so interesting, like sensitive souls make for the greatest songwriters and musicians, so it's like you're channeling that into something you obviously have a talent for. But I've been doing a podcast tour, which is so very different from being like musically talented. I just like I can walk out there and like, fart in the crowd like, oh, like, I don't have to do it much, but you, like you must just get so tired. But the adrenaline and obviously the fans and everyone that you get to meet like keeps you going and then you just crash so hard. It is it exhausting because I'm on like my fourth city and I'm like, I can't dad anymore. Well, I mean, when you do your podcast where like, are you talking? I mean, you must be you're talking about things. You're passionate, right? You have a conversations you want to be having. I mean, I've yet to find my my limit on on emotionally crashing and burning. And I think it has a lot to do with the fact that we were locked in our homes for a year and a half and I was so desperate have this connection with audiences again that I've been quoting mean mean girls with the with the team. Every time I tell them I'm like, I just I don't think there's a limit. I think I could just keep doing it and then it would take time. It does not exist. The limited number that seem classic classic to me. I get to go up onstage and, you know, talk about the most personal parts of my life. But I think that might be scary if I was just having a conversation because I'm singing these things and I have all of these people singing those things along with me, it really shifts what feels powerful. It's a good point. That's a good point. For some reason, I think for artists, it's so much easier for you guys to sing it than say it. And is that is that about maybe just connecting with the crowd because I feel that way, even like podcasting when I'm podcasting one on one, like, I love it. But there's something different about when the crowd is there, like feeling everything you're saying and laughing out loud at the jokes you're making and like, you really get to connect with with the people that are connecting with you every day without you even noticing. Totally, it is it's there's something about that validation that this stimulus from people like that where I even have a song I wrote with Maren Morris in the first lyric of the song is there are things that I sing that I never have the confidence to say really, which is 1000 percent true and merit. And I were having a conversation about how real that is both of our lives. There are things we have put in songs that would be tough to say to my closest friends. I was even talking with my manager before, before we talked and she was like, We're talking about like, you know, am I going to tell an embarrassing story or whatnot? And she was like, What about the story from from my track five on the album? I was like, No, I couldn't possibly tell that story. She was. Yet you're singing about it in the song. Millions of people have heard that. I'm like, No, no, no. I can't possibly talk about it. You have to. I guess I walked myself into that den that really did. You really did. But I feel like again it it was a really great Segway. I appreciate that because it's just going to transition so well into a little story here. So the floor is there as well. So I guess on the subject of things being easier to sing and say, I do think there's also it's kind of like a magic trick to take the parts of your life where you feel the most vulnerable and the sharpest. And if you can put them in something people can sing along to, all of a sudden it feels really powerful. There's one of my songs that goes, It's a song that I shouldn't be here. It's like we paid a visit to a past life when I was still yours and you were mine. Nothing had changed at all. I couldn't get it up for you the first time. Like, my body knew it wasn't meant to you. Maybe it was just the Adderall. I shouldn't be here. I shouldn't be here. Oh, I got glasses as the last. The first, that's the first verse. What song is that? Have I heard it? It's called I shouldn't be here. I think it's track or might be track. Five. I really just love it. That's how much you, my brain is like, Yeah, I shouldn't be here. It's on the album and I wrote it as a poem. Yeah, being somewhere that I shouldn't have been with someone I been there with. OK. Sometimes we sometimes into it. Intuition shows up in different forms, you know, in our our subconscious has ways of showing us where we should and shouldn't be. You're like, Thank you for that one. Exactly. I was like, This is not my moment. It's not like we get to expand on this embarrassing scene story. Or is that it? I'm like Names. Give me details. I did a bad job of going back to the wrong love for a long time and not trusting that in order to find the right love, I needed to leave space that was hard to leave and just fill that space because love is the best thing in the world, right? And I think we're all so we're all so excited about having it that sometimes will choose the wrong love over no love. And I've certainly done that. But I had to realize that until I filled that space with the wrong thing, I was never going to be open to the right thing. Mm hmm. Oh, amen. I feel like so many people that are listening to this right now are probably like clapping at home. Like, Yes, it's so true. I hope so. Love is the best. So sometimes we we pick the wrong kind. That's very true. It's actually, I mean, I've done that so many times, but even just like hearing other people say it like. Like, it's so beautiful that we all want love. But picking the wrong love sometimes like you. It is confusing. Like, you're like, is this what love is supposed to feel like? And then you go through different relationships where? Like, it's an unhealthy love. And then you get into a healthy love and you're like, But this is really easy, is that how it's supposed to be? And then it's confusing. Totally. And I think I have to take some responsibility on behalf of the songwriting community for perpetuating the idea that that dysfunction and toxicity is part of romance. Well, it's part of a lot of our experiences. Yeah, I think there's just so many, you know, this hurts me, but I like it songs. Yeah. And look, and I've been this, I've done this as much as anybody else is. The only reason I feel like I can talk about it is because I had been so bad at it. Yeah, I think like in almost every part of our lives, right? If something's, if something takes a lot of work is really hard to do, it means it's more worthwhile, you know, the harder it is to achieve. I think the the more value it has. And I think that's almost every part of our life, except for love. But like we tell ourselves like, Oh s**t, this is so hard and it's so hard to get you to meet me halfway. And it's so hard to get you to open up, and it's so hard to get you to trust this. But ipso facto, it's so hard. So it must be so beautiful and worthwhile. Yeah, it was works like that. OK, you guys with the most rental listings anywhere and yes, anywhere, you guys. There's no wrong way to get into your right place on apartments, dot com, for instance. You could latch all tablet to the wall, throw magnetic darts at the rental search map. That sounds pretty fun, actually. 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Do you think that has just gotten easier and easier over time? Because I know you said that you kind of were like that in high school, like you always had women around you because you expressed your feelings and you connected with them. So is this just something that's always been in you or does it get easier with age? It was. Yeah, it was definitely harder when I was younger. Yeah, it was harder because I thought, you know, being strong was somehow contrary to who I was naturally. Yeah, I thought, like being a quote unquote strong man meant being something other than myself. And, you know, redefining what strength as a man means, it's like something I think about a lot because I'm surrounded by all of these like amazing, mature, secure men who were also very nurturing, compassionate and emotionally connected to themselves. But like, you know, it's the toxic masculinity that, like we are just raised in and it just seeps into us from the moment we're born. I really like tells us that, you know, strength is our ability to hide our emotions, not to own them. And it took me a long time to come to terms with that. Yeah, I mean, you talk about being a songwriter and that you, you know, are part to blame for putting out ideas of relationships. But look at the Bachelor franchise. They're like Vikings. We like everybody's story. We've been flexing like, you eat this region, you will fight to the death if there were straight up real Vikings on the last episode. So it's I actually was going look like I had just woken up one morning and I was going to the like true meal where they have so much delicious food on the third floor of the hotel. Or I get in the elevator and I'm still half asleep and there's just four Vikings. Just like the morning I walked in and I was like, Whoa, I was like, Oh, OK, I forget where I am, like, You must be a part of the date. And they're like, No, they're like trying to trick me. And I just had to ride the elevator with these four sweaty Vikings. It was actually quite hilarious. But yes, lovely morning. I actually have a question for you. So at what point in the in the Bachelor casting? Did they decide everyone was going to be a bodybuilder? Yes, because I remember watching The Bachelor with my mom when I was younger, when I was like 12, 13 years old. Yeah, with the normal looking people on these shows, and now everyone looks like they're on the cover of like fitness magazines. How did this happen? You know what? I'm trying to pinpoint a moment in time where this happened. And that's a really good question, because I too have watched this since the beginning. And I mean, there is always a couple in there, but it was. It's interesting that now, like in the times we're living in where you want to like celebrate all shapes, sizes and colors that they are going like with everyone who looks like they are in a bodybuilding contest. Yeah, I wonder why. I mean, it would make if they weren't all body builders, it would make the the trope of the date where they beat each other up a little bit more complicated. Yeah, because we all know they're going to have those in every single season totally like you have Michelle out there saying, like, I just need you to be vulnerable and open with me now beat each other up with a teddy bear. Yeah, I need to circle back just before we get into bachelor stuff. I wanted to tell you that the song if the world was ending, which everybody's obsessed with, which is totally makes sense because it's one of the greatest songs ever to be written. And it's really powerful. And I wanted it so bad to dance do on Dancing With the Stars. It was my number one song. I'm like, Please, can I dance to if the world was ending, like, that's what I want to dance to. And they gave it to me, who was the runner up. I ended up winning, but he was the runner up and he got to dance to it. And I was like, No, it's such a good song, AGU. I wish they would have let you dance to it. I would have liked to have seen that. Yeah. And thank you. I mean, that song changed my life, and I'm real grateful for it. Yeah. And it's a cool story behind it, too, because I mean, it's with you and your girlfriend, Julia Michaels, which I also have a funny story about that. My girl who gives me facials I think knows Julia and or met her from giving her a facial like some sort of skin treatment. And she was like playing the song and Elizabeth, like, crated up. And she was like, I love this song. And Julia was like, It's my song. Well, yeah, it's so cute. But you guys, you guys met to write that song and wrote it on the first day you met, right? Yeah. Yes, we we wrote it the day we met. I asked her out that night. Come on. Which I had never done before. I always maintained I would never date another songwriter. Yeah, you all say that. So which is you dating another Bachelorette contestant? Exactly. That's exactly true. I always said that I'll never date another one not engaged with modulations, by the way. But I think it's a nice little metaphor for love always being better than our ability to come up with what it should be. So, yeah, and astro that night this this also was a contender for my embarrassing story. Oh, I get to I. I don't know what had come over me. I think it was like a combination of things. It was like the buzz of the song feeling so good. You know, I had also just gotten some really difficult family news like four days before meeting her, just like in a particularly like, I don't give a condition to do what I want to kind of headspace. Hmm. Life is short. Stop and let anything keep me from telling people how I feel. So I hit on her pretty blatantly after our session. Like, I asked her what she was doing after we wrote, she said, I'm going out for drinks with some friends and I go, You should invite me to that. Oh, that's awesome. And then she did, and then we danced, and she has the story of me dancing like I was pretending to be different types of trees, which I hardly remember. And then we. That's called contemporary dancing. Good for you. Totally. I'm the who are on the planet. So the fact that this works somehow is mind boggling to me. Sometimes that's endearing. Yeah, I guess. And then we shared a number with a bunch of her friends that we lived at the time. We lived together now, but at the time we lived pretty close together, which was actually the group of friends. She put her hand on my knee and the and the hoover was like, It's a wrap. She likes me. What a what a lovely evening this is been. And then I I texted her like, When can I see you again? And she pushed the actions of, I'm not sure that's a good idea. Oh, I hear you. But that means you want to write. And she goes, Yes, I'm just like, we like, had this cute push and pull. And then I said something, you know, I don't remember exactly what it was. I said, Well, look, I've got a lot of friends and a lot of songs that I love and not a lot of people that made me feel the way you did tonight. But if you just want to be friends, fine. And she didn't answer till the next morning, and I was texting all my friends being like, I hit on Julia Michaels too hard and I'm Julie Michaels. Too hard. I ruined it. And then the next morning, we wanted to take the next day, and five days later, I asked my girlfriend, and now we've been together for two and a half years. Oh, that's awesome. I love that. And you live together. That's like, that's real love when you live together and you can, you know, see each other at your high highs and low lows. That's all you need. I don't know how people don't live together before they get married. Kudos to them. And that's their decision. I just don't get it. I'd have to live with somebody before I knew. Yeah, I couldn't do that, either. It seems like it seems like you're getting into a lot without any prior research, right? Yeah. If you like having engaged at the end of a TV show, that's exactly what it's like. How stupid is that? I would have to argue as well that you actually get to know somebody on such a deep level on the show. I mean, they don't show it until it's literally like your final three people. That's when you really get to know these guys and talk about such important deep things and meet families and like, go through all those necessary steps to like, at least consider a proposal. But I mean, the rest of the show is just it's funny. It's a funny show to watch. I mean, a big part of Julian. My quarantine over the last year and a half was just cuddling up on the couch, drinking vulva and watching bachelor franchises. Yeah, absolutely. I mean, OK, what's your favorite out of all them Bachelor, Bachelorette or paradise? The most recent season of Paradise was a lot of fun. It was a good one. It was a really good one with a lot of putting. A lot went on. I think that was one of the most invested in, although we've definitely watched every season that happened during quarantine. So you watched with your mom years ago. Have you, like, missed and jumped back in and got on the train again? Or have you been like a loyal bachelor watcher? No, no. There is a significant gap. OK, so it was like watching as like a 12, 13, 14, 15 year old with my mom and and in Ontario. And then I watched for probably like 10 11 years. OK, OK. Big Gap started watching again with Julia that we got. I got so invested that like it made its way into a song stop. Well, the second, it's a song called Hold On to Me. That's on my woman. The second verse is I became an overnight fan at The Bachelor. You became an overnight fan at the Raptors. It's about our healthy, unhealthy enmeshment process. Know, I like that. That actually works well with each other, is your Raptors fan. Yes, she has a Raptors jersey. She knows the players' names. Wow, that's that's like me becoming a Bills fan overnight. I was like football's CFL. I don't know. Annika. OK, fine. I'll go with the bills because Jason, like eight sleeps, breathes, bills, mafia. So I really had no choice. But it's fun because I've joined at a time where they like to win. Yeah, that is good talent on that. There's something very romantic about adopting your partner sports team affiliation. I agree. I think it's really sweet and it says a lot about my heart that I would go through the bills and really commit to it like that. Totally. I think it's, you know, it's it's taking a step towards the person you love. And I think I mean, maybe the first couple of episodes I watched with Julia was for her, but like episode three, that was for me. I want people admitted. There's so many men out there that go, well, my wife makes me watch it and you're like, I get it. But also, you enjoy it. No, no, no. I'm involved, I'm I'm volunteering for podcasts now, and for most of the day to day catching up on the last two episodes and I enjoyed every moment of it. It was not the same without Julia because I really wanted to yell about Martin with her. Hmm. Would you want to yell about Martin? Does he drive you nuts? I just think talking s**t about other girls like the you're not like other girls line is red flag one to one red flag one. Oh, one. I totally agree. And like the whole like, we get it. You're from Miami. Well, some girls are high maintenance there, but what? What is that like? Why would you ever say that on national television while your mike is hot? Like that was a good idea. Like, I don't want girls. High maintenance girls can be high maintenance and still be like the best human beings on the planet. Yes. Absolutely. And I think, you know, sometimes the people who give the most love are the people who need the most love. Why would you not want that right? That's true, actually, that's very true. High maintenance women can also be the best lovers. I'm high maintenance, so it's the whole thing. Like the way he said it, the way he defended it. He didn't quite get it. I just think that was that was not the vibe, in my opinion. And I was like, really, really wanting to commiserate with Julianne on that one. But it's not about her, but I still very much enjoyed it. Would you go back and watch it again with her or she's somewhere else watching it and you guys just can't watch it together, though usually if we're not in the same place, we'll both watch on our laptops while we're on face time. Yeah, yeah, I love that you didn't do that today, but I will definitely watch it again with or I'll let her watch it and then we'll we'll debrief. But I know she's going to watch because she already had kind of an intuition bad feeling about Martin. Yeah, he looks like a nut. Now this is going to maybe seem because I mean, props to all the guys who own strip clubs, but he just looks like a strip club owner to me. A little bit. He's got an eyebrow. It's just, I don't know, I just there's something, there's something a vibe about him that I don't trust in tonight confirmed it. Yeah, that was definitely like it was what we needed to confirm that intuition, for sure. All right. So we've obviously shifted our lives quite a bit lately, including how and maybe where we work and learn. But sometimes it can really feel like the world is changing faster than we can all keep up with. And I know I felt like that myself before. So Talkspace online therapy is here to help you manage stress process, significant life changes and so much more that you can feel less overwhelmed and more in control. As most of my vinyl's know, I'm very open about my experience with therapy. And that's because it's just been such a helpful, necessary part of my life and part of growing. 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Thank you for saying that. I think it's a huge mistake. I think so much of what I see, so much of what we have loved about the last few seasons is moments that just would have never occurred with previous people running the show. I just it makes it so much better, and we are both extremely, extremely sad. If there's anything we can do to still like rally the powers that be to keep you running the show, I think it just makes everything better. Well, I know they're already filming the next season right now, but I mean, we might be continuing on as the host for The Bachelorette. It's not like we don't know anything yet, so we might. But we're definitely not for like Bachelor, Bachelor in Paradise or anything. But yeah, we we love doing it. I hope that happens. It makes the show way better. Like, if it was two other women, whatever I'm just saying, I think it's nice to have women there for the bachelorettes to be like, I've been through this and like it helps them open up more. I couldn't open up to Chris as much as I would to a woman who is sitting there being like, I've actually done what you've done before and like this all makes sense, like the empathy that comes from us and and compassion for her situations is is very new to the show. Thousand percent is Chris Harrison going to be sitting outside the bathroom door like talking to Katie in tears? Absolutely not. At moments that will just not happen without you. Yeah, that's and and that's where I thrive. I thrive on like being an empath and being able to like, sit down like the other day. I know they showed Michelle and I sitting down and was saying she didn't. And of course, there's only they needed to get that that point across, but we have the deepest conversation about self-worth and like I understood that I couldn't relate to her as a black woman growing up, but I could relate to her not feeling seen in relationships. We just had like a really important conversation, look like I just sat there was like. But like it was, we were able to have such a nice conversation. And yeah, it's I do. I think it's important. And I mean, maybe they do need a male host for the bachelors. I don't know, but I think women can just bring out a more vulnerable side. There's a reason you spent time around women growing up. If you like to be vulnerable, you can just bring that out easily, people. I think so, too. Yeah. All right, so to your question, who am I talk to much? We're going to have a top two. OK, who's your top two up to me? Like if I got to kick it with Michelle and give her my take? You're right. Number one is, Oh Lou, I love of Oh Lou. Yeah. I just feel like, Oh, Lou would have her back. I trust him. He seems so sincere. Yes, I agree. And like, and you know, we're talking about redefining what strength and masculinity means. Oh, Lou seems to represent that like top to bottom. Just yeah, he he understands the emotional self, but he's also is, you know, he looks like a bodybuilder. And I just I love the dichotomy in a person. They call him all Lou because he's so swole. Yeah, he certainly has earned that. Sure. And then I think my number two is Rodney. Rodney is up there for me to. I'm I'm intrigued because I thought you were going to say what everybody else is saying, everybody's like Joe, Joe, Nate, Rodney is up there for me. He is the most pleasant person to be around as well. Like, you just can't stop smiling when you're around him. Yeah, I mean, both of them, they just I think they're the least likely to hurt her. Yes, I agree. I I feel this. I feel that about Brandon, too. But he is such a baby like he just looks like such a little baby face. But that doesn't mean he would never hurt her. I really think he would like give. That relationship is always so sweet. He is extremely sweet. But you're right. He does kind of come off super young. Yeah, he seems like a little baby, not me. Joe and Ed seem great, too. I just, I mean, maybe I'm misreading it, but there was definitely a moment where you watched the most recent episode and. You know, she's was like really, really opening up tonight, and it could be totally off base here, but he just seemed petrified. It's actually interesting that you picked up on that and then Joe got a one on one. I thought that one on one was so sweet because I've been around Joe, obviously from the season, and he is so nervous around cameras and doesn't know how to act around them. But like she makes him so comfortable and he has such a solid human. And for him to open up about, you know, his feelings like that, knowing that he's more reserved was so huge from him. And I think it was just because of his love for Michelle, and I thought that was a really sweet date. That was a very it was a very sweet moment to him talking about like re understanding himself separate from sports. I guess it's very real. Yeah, I think it's definitely a show built for either extroverts or extremely attractive people. If you're introverted on The Bachelor, you have to be as stunning as Joe is. Yeah, I don't like I don't even realize this. He's handsome. He's he's very handsome. Nate understands he's handsome. Nate gets it. Joe, I think, doesn't understand that he's handsome. Yeah, but Joe is definitely more introverted, which is important in my time watching the show. It seems like a difficult play. I mean, a date with 12 other dudes is a hard place to be an introvert. That's true, especially when you're having to like, yell and be a Viking and like Flex and hit your chest, right? Yeah, exactly. I don't know. How do you feel about Chris S? The dude you just got to home. Yeah, that was all very strange to me. I think they were strange. We shall handle it perfectly. Perfectly. That's like some that's some patriarchal s**t like, you know, savior complex stuff. I actually really love like the way Michelle like deliver Michelle is very good at. Logically, thinking about what she wants to say and how she feels and delivering it in like the most beautiful way where I just react with emotion all the time and I'm like, What's that like? Get out of here. But she's really like, she's very like innocent and then thinks about how she's going to deliver it. And when it's said, I'm like, Wow, I was really well said, you know, I mean, it's it's hard to both be emotionally overwhelmed and articulate at the same time. Yeah, that's, you know, I struggle with to the Max. Me too. I get I get very insular when I feel like I don't, I can't say the right thing. Yes, me too. Used to say the right thing right off the job. I have a question for you. Do you think with Chris s really that shady or was that some editing shady? Well, like I always watch, obviously, as like, OK, stuff can really get edited. I mean, maybe it was a little more extreme than it was there, but I do remember her telling me like off camera about him and like seeing it firsthand. So I know it was real, but editing can always make it seem worse than it is. But yes, he's a he's a not the greatest idea. It was certainly shady. It was also just so convenient. It was like we lost a villain. And then five minutes later, we had a new one set. You know what? Sometimes I laugh because producers are like, I mean, this is too easy. My work here is done. Sometimes guys really do do this to themselves because you can only hide who you truly are for so long. You can come in and you can be who you want to be and what you think people would want to see. And that can only last so long. And so guys start to unravel and show their true colors. So that was like perfect timing that Martin started just like unraveling and that, you know, they might have been saving it. Who knows, but it was perfect timing. Yeah, that's super real. I wonder, like how much of it is just the guys walking into it and how much is just very, very well-produced storytelling? I think it's a little both. OK, I have a question because you've you've been on so many sides of this when you watched back your season of The Bachelorette. Like how much of it felt honesty, the experience you had when you were there? Well, a lot of it felt honest and the like main storyline of like the neck and Sean drama was between it was between two guys of like. Like, it was like, who are she going to pick? I mean, I knew I was picking Sean and the whole Nick and Sean storyline was definitely blown up. That actually surprised me how true it was to what I felt. That's awesome. That's really, really encouraging to hear. It was funny when I went on The Bachelor, I was like, I'm going to be the idiot on this show, like, I'm going to watch it back. My family is going to be mad at me because I was like guns blazing in that season. I was like cracking every joke I could. I was making fun of people. I was getting drunk. I was like, If you feel like ever, I just didn't care. But I knew like, look, I got along really well with the producers, I know I have a good heart. I was not like a nasty person. I was just like a firecracker. And I was like when I when I watch the preview for like coming up this season on The Bachelor, I was like, Oh God, they like, be getting naked, jumping in legs like sane one liners and sneaking into his tent. And I was like, Oh, I'm going to be the villain. And I was. So it's really editing is a powerful thing. I don't know if it's worked out well. I was telling Julia that we were going to have this conversation earlier today, and she just thought it was amazing that like, we've really gotten so deep into this and she goes, she goes, I wonder, I wonder if I went on as The Bachelorette if I could finally get you to propose to me? You're like, Well, if Neil Lane is providing the diamond, absolutely. Yeah, it would certainly help. And I was like, Baby, I don't know if that would work. I'm not sure. After two and a half years, we'd be able to navigate 20 other men. You know, I would just pull a clip. There you go. You can. Oh, that'll be forever known in the history of Bachelorette. Is pulling to Clare is just picking the guy right away, which I still don't know how she got away with, because that's definitely not in the contract. I can't imagine. I mean, not to put pressure on you, but you guys obviously talk about wedding planning or getting engaged. Sure, yeah, we're I mean, we're approaching two and a half years, and we have such a big, beautiful life right now. I would like us to be taking in every single moment, fully presently and whatever is happening. And I have every intention of being with you for the rest of my life. And I think, you know, it should be a moment where it doesn't have to fit in between other things. That's my take. I would imagine you've, you know, you would think this through and have a very special way of doing in it. So I can't wait until that happens, but no pressure. I'm so sorry that you just had to throw up in your mouth here and you say that you. I would love her to come on for a Bachelor recap if she'd ever want to do that. It was fun because I mean, we kind of just skim through bachelor things, but I also didn't want to leave without asking you about certain songs like What's your favorite song on your album right now? Probably. I just added a few songs to the album. I put out a deluxe edition. Yeah. Yes. And my favorites on the album is right now so-called soft landing. Yeah. Would you made the new single right as the new single? Yes. Tell me why that's your favorite. It's my favorite because it's the usually the way I'm emotional in songs is a very like two a.m. Try not to wake anybody up kind of emotion. Like very thoughtful, very quiet. Lee passionate and landing is one of a few songs where I'm just being screaming and really be cathartic. And it's nice to kind of. Leave all restraint aside and just have a moment where, you know, there's no reservations in that song at all, like, I really go for it. And I love it. It's kind of about it's about being in a conflict where you feel like everything is about to go to s**t. And you're not really sure there's anything you can do about it anymore. So you're just bracing for him. Hoping for the best. Well before for a soft landing. Oh, that's cute, I like that. And you also heard John Mayer plays guitar on one of your tracks, right? Yeah. He plays on a song called Here's Hoping on the album. We did it together on Colbert, which is one of the coolest moments of my life. Yeah, insane. Yeah, it was. We were like, it was just the two of us on Colbert as a duo. And you know, you show that video to 17 year old me and he on has a heart attack. Yeah, of course you show it to me now. It was such a special moment, and John is just like one of the most compassionate people I've ever met. He's been so kind to me and really for me and been, I've been a mentor. How cool is that? Gosh, like that would be like me interviewing Jennifer Aniston or Britney Spears. That like, I'm manifesting that right now. It's going to happen. Certainly happen. She's free now. So finally, it's probably on her list of things to do to get around to my email. I 1000 percent confident that both of those people know who you are and like you. Well, I know Jennifer Aniston knows who I am because she responded to me once on Instagram, and I know she's a Bachelor fan. Britney Spears did put me on her website about 10 years ago. Also, Justin Bieber, and that I had a moment the other day. I What do you remember Andrew S from Katie's season? Andrew? Yeah, the football player. Yes. I loved him. He's incredible. The nicest person is my favorite. Yeah, he a lot of people say he was Justin Bieber's favorite, and Justin followed him on Instagram. And I had a live podcast with Andrew as my guests and I was like, Give me your phone for a second. And I went straight to Instagram and I said, Just hear a video saying like, Hey, like, we're both Canadians. So like, we should probably like duet a song together. And he wrote back, and he was like, You guys are so funny. And I was like, Wow, that's a fantastic story. Yeah, I'm pretty excited about it. It keeps me up at night. So I'm like, Justin Bieber knows I am. I'm glad Bieber and I agree on Andrew. Yes, you do. Yeah, he's he's all white. Is Andrew as a bachelor someday? I hope so. I keep putting in a good word for that to happen because I would love to see it. Me too. Yeah, he's he's just an all around solid human being. Solid, solid salt of the Earth. Human being. OK, I have one game to play with you before we go. It's just hypotheticals. OK, so we know you're in a happy relationship. But hypothetically, what would your limo entrance be? Not music oriented because it's too obvious, right? I might set up some sort of like dorky board game now that's played. Lots of people do that. No, you don't think so. I don't think people do that. I really like the game Bananagrams. I love Bananagrams. There might be some like speed, bananagrams, speed, bananagrams. That's what it is that I would enjoy that if you came on my season ended speed bananagrams, I'd be like top four. Love that, OK? Dream artist to perform on if you were on a one on one as The Bachelor, you know how they have artists. Come on, who would be your dream artist to play for you? I'm not going to say Mayer, just because I've already had that bucket list moment. So probably either Chris Martin or Beyonce say, Oh, OK. I love Chris Martin so much. If you could make an appearance on any reality TV show, which would it be? Any reality TV show? OK, it's a tie between being one of the guests on Paradise and I guess there's also an ABC show, so Shark Tank as one of the celebrity investors. You don't want to make the pitch because I don't understand anything about that. Yeah, yeah. Quick, funny shark story. I've been watching Shark Tank for years obsessed or even watching it since Dragon's Den Dragons Den. Yeah, yeah, for sure. Julia. So I introduced Julia to Shark Tank in quarantine. Yeah. Or being just a mogul, she starts watching it in like four episodes and starts reaching out to the companies that she likes to invest in them herself. Oh yeah, that's that's hilarious. Julia, like, become casual friends, and it's just so cool. So your guest something on Shark Tank that I like that. OK, if you could wake up tomorrow with a new talent or skill, what would you choose? I'd like to speak every language as, Oh, that is, so I want to speak. I'm so mad at myself for not learning French. Did you learn French? Now, if I had known how wonderful it would have been to speak French and adult, I would have paid attention in those ten years of French cla*s. I agree with you completely. I can't believe my brain didn't soak up any French from taking all the classes. I'm like, What was I doing? We literally, if you think about it, we were required to take French for ten years. Yeah, grade one to 10 in Ontario, you have to take French, right? Excuse your brilliance while that's all I got. Oh, A-minus. If somebody says, like Chris, how do you see? How are you and French? Almost ever. Oh yes, I was about and I say some email al-Ata. That means my headache. I read some things you learn when you were 13 that stuck with you. Oh gosh, it's very easy. OK, last one. If your life was made into a movie, who would you want to play you? It's tough because there aren't too many like go to ginger actors fast, which it sure is. It going to be an accurate movie? Look at would they? Any Leonardo DiCaprio could become a ginger to play you? Yeah, but by the time I have enough s**t to talk about, there's is going to be too old for the role. That's true. Maybe there'll be like a new ginger actor who shows up in the next 10 years. Maybe Prince Harry takes some acting lessons. Way of googling this ginger actors. Yeah, I got the perfect one. Rupert? No. What is that guy's name? He was Agent Brody on Homeland Homeland. Yeah, that guy, what's his name? I don't know, but he he was in billions to. They're not even giving his name. They're just saying red headed actor. OK. Oh, Damian Lewis. Yeah. Yes. Damian Lewis, that's a good one to be cool. I'm hoping for some, like up and coming ginger actors to play the role. I think Aunt Ginger is like, like, they will be extinct in 100 years. That's cool, that's cool. You're one of them. No, when I said earlier this year, we got made fun of for in high schools. It makes us cool now. Yeah. Now it's being a ginger is what I got bullied for. Being sensitive is what I got bullied for her. Being a singer was what I believe. For now, I've built my whole life on being a sensitive singing ginger slow into a fast clap for that. That's that is what it's about right there. I like I wish I could fist pump you through the screen. Oh, that's awesome. Not only just like a singer, but like a well known, like, highly respected artist. So I am so grateful that you came on the podcast today held you last. You can come on any time if she wants to and tell everybody where they can find you. Wherever you follow people on the internet. I would love to be one of those people. It's Jeffrey Sachs JP as a Z and Kaitlyn, thank you so much for having me. This was such a fun thing for me. Oh good. I'm so glad. I mean, we'll do it again next season, and you can be just like a reoccurring. Maybe you and Julia could do it both because I feel like you'd have good energy feeding off each other since you say like you wanted to yell at Martin with her. You can do that on on the podcast for another recap. I think that's a great plan. I think so, too. OK. We'll reach out, but I'll tell her it's the game plan. OK, thank you so much. I'm Kaitlyn Bristowee. Your session is now ending. Thanks for listening to Off the Vine Break therapy. Tune in to hear new many sodas every Thursday and check out new full length episodes every Tuesday exclusively on PodcastOne dot com, the PodcastOne app and subscribe on Apple Podcasts Google with O TV. Hi, everybody, this is Julie Chrisley inviting you to listen to our podcast, Chrisley Confessions on the PodcastOne Network. Each week, we play listener voicemails and offer advice, suggestions and opinions based on our own life experiences. Also, listen in to get the latest updates on all things Chrisley. New episodes every Wednesday on PodcastOne. Apple Podcasts, Spotify and Amazon Music. Amazon Music's new podcast, Country Heat Weekly, hosted by Kelly Sutton and Amber Anderson, brings the beloved playlist to life every Thursday, Kelly and Amber deliver the vibrant world of country music right from Music Row in the heart of Nashville. That's cool. I used to record my podcast down there. They will entertain you with today's top tracks. Talk to music legends and upcoming stars to reflect on the energy, range and diversity of today's country music, and they'll be spilling the sweet tea about what's happening on the scene here in Nashville. So turn up the volume and get the hottest in country on Amazon Music's country heat weekly. I love finding out what's going on in my city, obviously of Nashville, and you guys know how much I love country music, so it's perfect pod to fill you in on the scene. Find a follow country heat weekly on Amazon Music or wherever you get your podcasts.