Part 2: Tiger King's Carole Baskin, plus more Brad Williams, and the News (ACS Jan 27)

Transcript

Turn up the heat this summer with Deliveroo from a sizzling collection of restaurants in your area. Save big with bundles, meal deals and offers on faves like big juicy burgers, cheesy pizzas, crunchy salads and more lots more. Open the Deliveroo app and order now. Summer never tasted so good. Applicable to existing customers as the 25th of May 23, but each ordered over 25 bound jurisdictions and service and delivery fees applies if all goes and sees a delivery code or UK search terms. Well, a lot of comedy in this show. Comedian Judy Miller is in studio comedian John Krista's in studio and legendary Cobb's club owner in San Francisco. Man has been around comedy, soul life. Tom Sawyer is going to join us as well, and we'll do all that right after this. All right, this show brought to you in part by SimpliSafe if if you have 30 minutes, you never have to worry about break ins ever again, just go to SimpliSafe.com/ and get all the sensors you need, all the help you need as well to set it up. Custom systems going to show up posthaste at SimpliSafe.com/ n o o o o writing protect your engine against sludge and wear with a synthetic oil change. O'Reilly Auto Parts has five quarts of mobile one full synthetic motor oil for thirty five ninety five plus get two times over. Rewards points are professional parts. People can recommend the supplies you need, including a filter, bottle, shop towels, drain fan and more. Stop by O'Reilly auto parts or visit O'Reilly Auto dot com o o o O'Reilly Auto Parts. I'm. From Corona One Studios in Glendale, California, this is the Adam Carolla show. Adam's guest today, comedian John Krist and the founder of Cobb's comedy club Tom Sawyer. Plus, Jody Miller returns and Chris Locks a drops in with the news and now completely unprepared for a tsunami. Adam Carolla. Yeah, get it on. Got to get on a they're to get in on that student thanks to a friend of that about you. Good to see you skinny, Jeremy Miller So skinny and John Chris, get it on ! Very funny. Stand up comedian latest special John Chris would like to release a statement. And it's available on YouTube. It's very funny. And so there's a lot to talk about with Jon because oh yeah, your material struck a chord with me. And speaking to standup and specials, Jody Miller is going to finally finally be shooting her standup special at the Ice House. Oh yeah, that'll be July 21st to show two shows. And if I go there and be part of it, yes, that's what you rely on the audience. Come out there. Maybe we'll get a shot of you laughing, sleeping. I shall be at the ice house as well, but it's sold out. So we finally were moved to Flex right after she seriously, guys like, I'm going somewhere with this, which is I've repeatedly said if the show is sold out, don't put it up on the board for me to plug because it's sold out. So you must communicate those who know it's sold out with the people who make the board. And when I say that to my August, he gives me one of us. I have a couple of favorite Mike August answers. He always got. How could it hurt? And I go, well, to shame my friend. I mean, yeah. So I guess we could talk about a plan to throw a picnic for last Fourth of July weekend. It wouldn't hurt, doesn't hurt, doesn't hurt. But I wouldn't reverse it and ask, how does it help? So that's that's with everything sold out on your calendar, except Des Moines, Iowa, was the only one you might be like. We got to go. We got to fly out there. This show must be. You know what? I am going to just come right back to you. It actually could help you. You know why? Because people see it sounds. It sounds cool. They go on the site, it's sold out earlier and then they're so angry. So they have to go to your other, Oh yeah, we'll go to Boise. Yes. And boys really want to make a weekend out of it. Why can't get it in L.A.? You're right. Yeah, that supply and demand that would probably cover most Americans. All right. So, so much to to get into now. Now Jodi has there's an article that we've been wanting to get into what we saved it for jodi that Dawson hands are. You have. Not really sure why you saved it for me, but. Well, it was about four. David's commentary was in Spain, where they were basically saying You can now take a leave for your menstrual cramps. If you're on your period, you don't have to go to work. No, you don't have to go to work. It's a policy that just came out. If you've got your period and you want a couple of days off to nurse that period, you can take three days off, three days off, sometimes up to five. You have to bring. We were talking before this and I told John, You actually do have to bring a jar of your blood into the office to show how much blood you have lost. Aha. So they get you got less or less and they're going to weigh it and see, OK, that was actually done. Is there is no example. That's not it. No, you just need you just need a doctor's note. You don't need the actual blood. Yeah. My experience with this time of the month was issued with women that got I got sucked into it and then I learned my lesson, which is early on when I had a girlfriend and she would be all nutty cuckoo. And I would be like, That doesn't make sense. Or Why are you so hostile or irritable or whatever? And then at some point she would get to the other side, and she would say that was just the cramps and the menstruation, and I was on my period. So yeah, you shouldn't have listened to me. In other words, it's like, don't take whatever I said personally, I was out of my mind, right? And then I thought noted. And then a month later, she started to go out of her mind. And then I did what a normal human being would do. I got her sweetie. I know what's going on right now. The during your period, you're you're not making sense, you're lashing out. And she'd be like, I'll f**king kill you. And I'm like, Oh, I thought we had this arrangement, right? I got to bring it up. But I guess that's OK. You're not allowed to. You know, and actually, they should actually put that in this law that you are not allowed to say or you on your period. I think this actually benefits everyone. We can't. Yeah, yeah. You can't ever ask a woman, Are you on your period? Truthfully, she might have been out of her mind, but I think a lot of those thoughts were based. In reality, she just she just came across as, you're angry, you know, they exaggerated you and you can't say it. She has to admit after my bat, you can. So we can say that's exactly it. I actually. Here's the thing I think. This is great, although, I mean, if you have that bad of cramps and I and I'm fortunate I wouldn't suffer that much, I have friends that literally could not get out of bed. It was really they would sometimes pass out. It was really bad, but you could take a sick day for that. I mean, I guess it shouldn't cut into your normal sick days. But I mean, I think this is a good thing. And also, I think it's the benefit of everyone in the office doing anything to like, Thank God, Marge isn't here. I would say emotionally and from possibly a janitorial position as well, but I think nobody is a bigger cheerleader for this legislation. Janitor, because he's like heavy. Hilda isn't ended a heavy bleeder, Hilda. Well, they do a lot of that. Don't flush the pads and don't flush the stuff. I don't know what goes on in there, you know, in the women's bathroom. I know what's going on. Yeah, well, they go general. Here's the thing about all other countries. Yeah. First thing they don't have is great plumbing. That's true. You go to Mexico. There is a whole line of things not to flush. Yeah, I mean, like, don't even look at this toilet water side at all. If you have one contact, pop into the bowl, call the f**king plumber. Like, do not flush with a paper towel, flush, possibly with a friend. The other places are like, We're out of water. Yeah, there's a lot of toilets over just it's a trash compactor. Yeah, I'll take anything. I'll take our Commercial Toilets Act. I've seen people's hair move from different stalls. Once they hit the plunger like that, take everything out of airplanes and commercial buildings. Lead the world. You're right in flow. That's right. So then there's a tie in. There are people putting weed in there in the airplanes. Every. Everything. It's all. It's all going. It's all turning a blue eyes. So what's my rap name? So then you go to other places. I go, do not flashiness. I'm guessing in Spain, they don't have a robust sewer system and there's probably a sign in Spanish or Portuguese or a f**k. They speak over there that says, do not spend the night, in which case it has to go into the hopper. Now it's into the trash can or should always spin it around and fire it at the ceiling. Like so much fun to do with a guard or battle that it's actually not that much fun. So either way, the janitor bears the brunt. He'll go, Yeah, yeah, well, we didn't all have it. I feel like in 2019, when everybody left were 2020, everybody left work in March. And still, nobody has come back like it was just kind of a there's a lot of work from home stuff happening, there's a lot of sick. They were remote and no one really ever came back to work. That's right, except the janitor. Well, is it is. It turns out most people do not like going to work. And if you gave them the chance to stay home, they would. But the reasons you could stay home were pretty limited. When I was younger, working before the pandemic. Having said that, though, as someone who works remotely and goes into the office, I actually enjoy going into the office. So a lot of people say that if you do, it's I think it's I think it's not a good idea for everybody to stay remote. I agree there's no social interaction anymore. There's a social cues. Zoom is crazy. You're there's no reason to get dressed. You get more depressed. I remember during the beginning of the pandemic, we were all working remotely on the show. Funny, you should ask writing jokes. And I just at one point was so just depressed that I just put a full face of makeup on to make me feel better because you're just walking around unsure or just clicking on your resume. I'm like, Put yourself together. Have somewhere to be. Talk to other humans or you on your period at this point. I was bleeding everywhere. It was uncontrollable. My cats were swimming in it. It was just a mess. I had to call a janitor to come. It was just terrible. Out of the many bathrooms I'm reading in Spain have signs asking you not to flush toilet paper people. Still, no toilet paper. Toilet paper? Well, that's on them. Throw it in the bin. All right. Even like the even number two, even the poopy pooping toilet paper, I assure you, I am guessing that is when you use the toilet paper. You know, most effectively. Yeah, I mean, but you're not supposed to flush it back for it. You don't want to be a janitor in Spain. Oh, that's a that's a curse that you could yell at your kid. Like, you don't f**king get your grades up. You're going to be a janitor in Spain. Dad, no pushing a mop at Barcelona. Well, it wasn't. What is what is the you know, you ever have like that you grew up here. Was ever like a Dodgers World Series or Super Bowl where like a hangover sick, they were there like, Hey, we're not going to work tomorrow? Yes. Was there those days we had the worst of all worlds we had when I was in school? Schools canceled because no, never had we had smog days, which now here's the worst thing about me whose it was a horrible student, but but a great athlete. The schoolyard was I was like a marlin in the open sea, and then I went to the classroom and I became Mike Tyson. I don't know if these words are smog. Days would be. You had to show up at school, but we're canceling recess, so it's too smoggy to run around. It's not very smoggy to stare at a Sullivan book. Yeah, yeah. So you just sit. This is loosely terrible. Can't have that. You know, I just I'm glad I didn't grow up here. I grew up in New Jersey and the second you'd see one snowflake at six o'clock at night, you knew it's going to be a heavy snowfall. You watch it. No kid fell asleep. We'd all get up throughout the middle the night. Look at the streetlights. See it. Wait for that phone to ring at like 6:30. And then my mom so angry that we get to stay pissed. She opened the door. She's like, Don't bother getting up. Schools closed. She's so angry that she's got to watch you all. Yes, you're going to take off work. It was I was like, You know, it's probably not appearing in Spain. It's it's advised that you bring your own toilet paper from where. But what do you do with it then that you just like, carry it home with you, you bring your own to it. I wouldn't bring the whole roll from here. No, you don't know. You have to bring the whole roll. You don't know. You don't know what your day is going to be. You think it's going to be one way and then you eat something and it turns into an explosion out of your a*s. You can't just bring a few sheets. You got to bring the whole roll. I think I could calculate that before I left the house. You've never had a day where you're like, I not do that. Me, I I would throw caution to the wind and I would say, Look, I think today's about a three square, four square day. Whoa, oh, hold on. I'm going to double that number and put it in my wall safe. You've never miscalculated that. You've just like going about your business in your stomach starts making that noise. You're like, Oh my God, this is not going to be a good day. Well, in Spain, I guess you bring your own toilet paper to work at the restaurant. Spain, Spain strikes me as a satchel wearing a community. If he buys a lot of, yeah, sad man purses, you're at work. I think you can bring the whole roll and keep it in your desk, right? And then you just carry it with you. That is not in the back. There is not in the bathroom. You got to bring your, I don't know, in Spain, you think they sell like toilet paper, roll hats or something. Looks like an arm on that. And that's great business. If you just stand outside of an office building or any establishment and you sell toilet paper to people, people forget. To bring it right, right, I forgot my glasses, I've oh, I forgot my umbrella. It's also the toilet paper hat. You get to be clear on the instructions first wear white, but why not? And that's a mark up outside of the market. A majority of public toilets in Spain have no seats. I told you they were f**king pardon the pun a*s backwards when it came to the toilets and the plumbing. And I think this I think this I think the Restaurant Tours Association of Spain is pushing this legislation could be. I think it's about plumbing. It could be about. It's janitors. Now you guys have all we've all toured here and a lot of military places. Items are sold out, but we all are also down. He doesn't even talk about it because what's the point? Yeah, I can't help. But I've gone where in Kyrgyzstan and I know in a lot of Asian countries too, it's just a hole in the ground, in a restaurant and you stand over it and just whatever's coming out, it's coming out. Then you pull that lever sucks it down, but it's just a hole in the ground. I've always wondered, and maybe Jerry can help me with this with the buddy. Oh yeah, no, it's your seat on the day. Hmm. There's a seat on the big day. No, I mean, I've only been on the ones that are the combination one where you can push the button and it shoots up from the toilet, but slammed into the sea. Oh yes, there by day. Oh, I've just not. I don't think I've ever used the bidet. Never use it. But they know and I believe that Beyoncé and Jay-Z's birthdays for sale. How much? Oh yeah. If you have to ask, you can't afford it. Can't come out some more shows. Yeah, some take like, it was a good day. Beyonce's birthday. I saw it on TMZ, but my point is is the birthday there used birthday. I it's I do not know. Yeah, it's just you. Are they going to sign it? I don't know. But they removed all their fixtures. I saw it on TMZ and they, you know, gave it away a train. And some while the entrepreneur figured out here's where it came from and they're selling is faucets sinks by. But here's my point. The bidet you sort of straddle, right? But a seat? First off, there should be a grab bar like on a bus or something. Not everybody has good credit balance. As people been drinking, they're wearing platform shoes. Oh God, the band, you're drunk. You can't. I can't imagine that sensation dressed to the nines. Your dress is pulled over your head. You can't see. You got the heels. You got the stiletto heels on the show grab bar. There should be a great look. This should be a grab bar over the toilet. Why? Well, no harm be. It couldn't hurt. Just I could lower myself. I can help myself up. What is it, if you put it put alcohol? Like if you put it like, that's how you mainline alcohol like a butt chug. And if you do an alcohol enema, you will get wet so you could get off the whole. If you put water that'll sober, you right up. Sure. So were you right? Maybe that's what it's there for. I don't know. I don't know if it was sober me up or I don't know. But Dave Benson, it's got to be down 67 percent. 67 percent. That's a huge, specific number. Well, I've looked in there and I know guys in the business. I'm just saying, you got you got to integrate it into the toilet seat now. Yes. Yes, that you're right. And I like the one in the toilet seat. My friends have them and it's heated and it's nice and you sit down and then you want like, you know, it's like a car wash. You want the ultimate. Do you want the deluxe? Yeah. As a premium, you know, the wax on the room, I get the armor all. Yeah, I got to get that. I got to shine it up. I snapped the towel off the I'm going to just show the guy working in the club, the guy working in the bathroom and women's bathrooms are no. Yes, they all about wake up and cologne lipstick and go give him a couple bucks. Oh, really, you guys, you know the bathroom attendant, the mattress that I know I've never really thought about the women's bathroom. Yeah, what do you what are your the products? That's I think I think ours originated before that. Well, maybe not, but no hairspray, lip gloss, eyeliner, blush, perfume. There's so much more in the women's bars are just condoms, and we know ours is like a full face of makeup. A makeup artist pops up. All right, well, let's talk etiquette with that guy because that guy's got the toughest job in America, right? I think that's a tough one to get in. Well, Spanish plumber, yes, it's up there and janitor, but your dad said you're going to be a bathroom attendant, if lucky. That's great. Let's let's just put it this way. I was traveling a couple of bathrooms. I hit some public bathrooms over the last. There you go. The plan is in and out as fast as humanly possible. Right? Because there's a guy there and he's off loading and you're there and you're taking a pass and you want to get out and I don't want to hear him. He knows I'm there, so he's holding holding it. You know, he's not letting it fly. It's respectful. I repeat he heard footsteps. Yes, and and but I'm in and out as far as I can. Yeah, but when that's your job, you are literally just camped out in a bathroom and a bathroom and you're in a strip club and guys are f**ked up and they're going in. There's guys brooding and then this guy yakking, Oh yeah, it's got to be guys yakking. You're too f**kin sick. A convention for like aluminum siders and guys are going at it since noon and it's now four in the morning and there's no spot for him. There is always like kind of. No, he doesn't know that times. They have a chair. Sometimes that's nice. Have a chair, but it's usually like right in the middle of the room. All right. So he's there. He's got the worst job in America. Worst job. Now there's an etiquette and there's an etiquette with him. The same way there's an etiquette for you getting dropped off in front of the hotel with your luggage. Oh, good, good. If the guy in the curb grabs your luggage, it's Tip City USA, right? Yeah. Yeah, I could have 14 pieces of luggage. I'll grab them all and just cause and then I'll grab the go. No, no, I got it and I go, You know, you don't got it because I don't have ten bucks. I don't have that. No, yeah, I don't have cash. And if you take one of these bags into that hotel that it's on, I have to tip you. Yes, now and I don't have any cash. So no. Now in the bathroom etiquette, the monitor, you do not have to pay that got you do not have to tip that guy. No, if he hands you a mint or shot a are a little lax. You got a tip. Yeah. If you ask for something and he has paper towels ready, that's the equivalent of the guy on the curb at the hotel that grabs your back. If you wash your hands and he hands you a paper towel and you accept that paper towel in an exchange, that is that is a contract you've now and you now have a contract with this person and you must tip. And now you've got to reach into your pocket and go in front of. There's no because sometimes when you're in the car, these getting the girl, you can kind of do advertising and you have to watch my watch my cash situation there. I don't think anyone's ever. A man has never walked in and go, Oh, thank God, there's a bathroom attendant got there. There's a witness for this. Never, never, never, never get this water out of the faucet. Dry my hand. But he was a trained technician. You don't have cash on you and you're there. You're not taking anything from his tray. Now there's no other way to get a hand towel. There's no he's blocked all the hand, blocking the towel, locking the towels, and he hands it to you. You don't have cash. Do you just like walk out with wet hands or you? I think there's a bigger problem afoot here. What happens? Walk out that as a strip club? Oh, I, I forgot where I was. Remember when I accept the towel, that is an agreement to pay. OK, when the contractual right, when the bellhop puts his hands on your suitcase and lifted off the ground, that is a contract. So you either take the towel or he takes your bag. It is the same. I hate tipping that guy, right? And it makes me a bad person, and I'll I'll try to not tip. Yes. Oh yeah. Tipping never makes you happier. Rare of rare. It makes me a bad person because. I am in a strip club that when you enter a strip club, there are concessions made strip clubs as the campaigns have ATMs. Yeah, yeah. The vig on it, it's like twenty six plus, right? I was like, You want to get out? Forty dollars, you just paid seventy one dollars. Yeah. Like, it's that kind of waste of money and you're doing the prime rib in a strip club is $76 and you should know where you bought your you bought the gal who gave you the lap dance a miniature bottle of champagne ale for seventy seven dollars. Yeah, yeah. Like there is no money up or down. You've you've taken up five dollar bills. You've balled them up and you throw them at the at the crotch of the woman who was laying on her back on the stage. That's that's your relationship with money. Yes. You're not talking about Roy, right? There's almost zero return on investment. But soon as I go into the bathroom, I turn into Warren Buffett. Oh yeah. I'm like, There's no reason I should give this guy $2. Very tight. Just been making it rain. Yes, I've been taking cash and balling up and throwing it at a stranger. The poor guy in there. Now he's thinking about balancing his Chuck Schumer. As you said, you're sober. Yeah, you're very fiscally conservative. And this guy's always from, you know, some African continent that is of war. There's some there's some warlord running around. He escape. I think it's the guy that didn't get the cell phone kiosk job at the mall. It's his he's an understudy. Does he stay there? And I am dead set against giving this guy three dollars so you just don't take a toll. Well, now here's the problem, and here's unintended consequences. OK. Because I think there's a lot more infections spread from handshake at the strip club. Oh, because I could see that guys go in and they drop it deuce. They take a squirt. They know that they've made a deal with the devil. They go to that sink. Oh yeah, that guy's handing him a towel. They don't want that. They don't want to tip him. So what do they do? They do what I do. I beeline it for the door. I just look down and I walk with purpose. You don't wash. Now I'm in the club, dirty hands high five and glad hand and drop digits. You know what I mean? And now there's an infection. OK, it's how it starts. That's outside the Wuhan lab. That's where it emanates from. That's exactly right. So you this way, you're at the strip club. So when you're at the strip club, you have cash and there's an ATM. I'm talking about masters. You go to a restaurant. You don't have cash on you. Castro, let him know you're doing well. Yeah, yeah. Right. I can sell out clubs. So you go to the bathroom at Maestro's. You drop it. Do you want to look that guy in China? Yeah. Shrimp c**ktail. Yeah, that's like the size of your face. I know. And you're about. You want to order that butter cake, but you got to make room, so you've got to clear everything out to f**k off. Our cake is so good. So do you think there's some sort of shrimp c**ktail? f**king Nazi. Who's like doing the math where there's like two of you sitting in the table and they go, it comes with five. Yeah. So you're going to have a f**king fistfight. $14 shrimp. But I believe when there's three of you at the table, I go. It comes before, like I was just trying to. I was trying to f**k with if there's an even number God, right? There's how many people at that table, how many people, if there's five of you at the table and I'll go, it only comes because you can get that. I'm sorry. Tower two in there. I would do it just to start a f**king fly and every table. So shrimp are really good. OK, so you're in the bathroom and you've cleared out your system. You want it. You know the guy standing there, he's very nicely dressed. He probably makes a little bit more than the strip club attendant. You don't have cash. You wash. Do you not wash your hands? You go back to the table? Or do you wash and say to the guy, I'm so sorry, I don't have any cash? Word master was now, yeah, where? Where are we? Where are you? You can wash your hands because you're right. Going back, you're going back to grab the bucket and bread. And that's hand on pretzel bread, the pretzel bread. You're going back in for the pretzel bread and you're not using a fork and knife on the pretzel bread. I think at that point, you got to go with the sink and Venmo him. Yeah, yeah. Oh, they have bar codes, I see you. Yeah. In Nashville, they have. All right. Well, yeah, that's the problem. It's going to be like you guys the strip club. I would expect you to have cash. That's probably the best place to be intended. There's no excuse if you're not having cash. Yeah. Nobody brings cash anymore. Small bills you have to strip club bathroom. You're like, I don't have cash to make you. Do you do? Just so, you know, for the most part, unless I borrow something from that woman, she hands me a towel and she's walking the towels. Then she gets, No. I don't have any cash. Don't have any cash. You just you just give me a towel. Thank you. She is blocking the towels in the towel. Yeah. What are you sure out of the way? There's something here. I have more and more stuff. There's like gum and then there's like a couch in there. They're just like, Sit down. Let me rub your feet. I like the conceit that you've come there to snack like, I'm going to the bathroom because I'm hungry. If I do snack, then I want to make sure. Yeah. Got some Cheetos? All right. So we're for the legislation out of Spain. I'm absolutely for it. I think it's I think it's kind of s**tty that they say that it's even though they suffer. What did they say? It's some of them. Jodi by a second. Tell me if this is wrong. If I'm the boss, OK? If I'm the boss in Spain, OK, let's play this out. I got a big magnet board in my office. I got the dates on there. You can go ahead and tell me you're out for three or four days because Angelo came to visit, but I'm putting a magnetic woman who's crying on that date and with an X. Yeah. And if you don't sync up your next one, like if you try to jump two weeks, oh OK. Because you're trying to buy an extra couple days, is your boyfriend now? Now we know station I keep track of. Yeah, we know. So now is no more fair trade. You've burned all your excuses. That's totally fair because another time then I can just say I have food poisoning and you wouldn't, right? So you if you have employees here, would you rather hear a runaround or would you want a I got drunk last night. I can't get up. What do you want to hear as a boss from these guys? I like what would you respect more? I will. I will take. I don't mind. Well, my thing about like, I'm hung over. I'm whatever, you know, I used to work construction. I had a girlfriend that was a stripper dance the whole. I'd be I'd be happy. Yes, we'd be done at three a.m. and I had to be on the job at 6:30 in the morning and I just showed up. You know, I'll tell you what, I'll tell you what the greatest. Predictor of employees showing up is not paying them when they don't show up. The second this thing happened where you just went well, you'll get paid, whether you show up or not, attendance went down. Yeah, quite dramatic. The thing about construction is it's the number one job for not getting paid if you don't f**king show up and guys would show up green code been up from the night before like, but you're still learning a mouthful of throw up like, like one bird. And by the way, that's not who you want building a structure that's who is building your. Absolutely. It was definitely over overdue. No, you look, go tear apart any house from like the twenties were like old Irish guys building what happens. You will find bottles of Scotch buried into the wall because they're f**king getting loaded. Yeah. Here's a good one for you. I added a bathroom into my guest house because I sell out shows and s**t. And this was when my daughter was born, so I wanted, you know, my dad to come out a lot. And these guys are great. I've used them before and it was this one guy's cousin and his friend, and they'd worked on a different project for me. It was the middle of summer. It was just really, really hot. And one day after their shift, it was like a Friday. My neighbor comes over and he goes, Is that your? Your guy? I go where he goes in the middle of the road. He was laying in the middle of the road. We thought he was dead and I ran over and he's like, my daughter saw him like, go up against his car and then slide down and roll into the middle of road. It was six o'clock. My daughter just gone to sleep. I had to get ready for like a show, but I run out there. He's flat, is out cold and I'm leaning over him like, we're pushing him. He's not responsive at all. And his daughter was like, He's drunk, he's so drunk. I couldn't Mélanie alcohol on him. But it turns out he was wasted and then it was like, Well, where's the other guy? The other guy got in his car, drove down the street, realized you couldn't drive, got out of his car and laid on my neighbor's lawn. Oh no. These are my two construction workers. Now, of course, I'm like, they wouldn't do that. I brought them donuts that day, too. That's the kicker. I wanted to be sweet and be like, your fault. It's my fault. So enabler. I went in there because the ambulance came. I called my contractor my contract. They had to bring him to the hospital like alcohol poisoning. My contractor, I call him. I'm like your duties on the ground. So he was like, Would you go find his wallet? So I go into the house that they're working on and I see beer cans, but I see them surgically split in half what I thought was, like, really weird. When I went in there was like this. Wherever they what do they do? Do they drink them and then like, cut them with cans cut, cut in half, right? That's. And then I just I couldn't find the wallet. I go through my show the next morning, I go back there to look again for his wallet, and I realized that all the liquor that I had pushed aside because it used to be just the pool house and people would drink there all my liquor. When I say giant bottle of tequila and one brand new bottle of maker's mark completely empty, they were using the cans as short courses as classes. Wow. So they drew resourceful. That's resourceful. There was also easily available. Sorry about that, but they do me my bathroom like they were doing plumbing and they destroyed a bottle of patron and a bottle of maker's mark and then went out to my street and just laid down. And I, but I guarantee, showed up to work the following f**king that day the guy got out of the hospital. Oh yeah, oh yeah. Once you tell him if you told those guys you get paid, whether you show up or not, they'll never show up. Well, he came. I didn't. We didn't keep him. The my contractor was like, We're going to move him to another job. Oh, my cousin and I was like, OK, yeah. But the other guy came. He apologized, and then they finished my bathroom in the bathroom runs great. But oh my gosh, the toilet pressure still pretty good. Good. I take my iPad, but I'll try to try it with a couple of cans in there. I think it works. Yeah. All right. We'll take a break a lot more to talk to these two about right after this. Let me tell you about SimpliSafe, if you've heard us talk about SimpliSafe and how they were named Best Home Security of 2023 by U.S. News and World Report. But they're not resting on their laurels now. Always innovating new two in one smoke detector and co detector distinguishes between fire and cooking smoke, so you get fewer false alarms. We've all used SimpliSafe here for years have been around for with us for over a decade. Peel and stick batteries lasts up to 10 years. You don't have to pull wires. You don't have to drill at home to make a mess. 24-7 professional monitoring service, by the way, trained agents respond in an emergency, dispatching police, firefighters and or EMTs right to your door, even if your way or can't be. 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I went out to dinner with her and her husband, and they're doing. This is a passion project for them, and it works. I take it every day makes a huge difference. It is just thrive, right? Dawson with just calm and just thrive. Probiotic, you'll have the ultimate stress writing duo to help you feel cool, collected and in control. Get 20 percent off your first 90 day bottle of Just Calm and just thrive probiotic. Today, visit Just Thrive Health dot com and use promo code Atem. I see things different always, have you ever seen this sign in a neighborhood drive like your kids live here, drive, drive, like your kids? Oh, I was like, What if you hate your kids? Once you stop putting signs all over this neighborhood, Karen, and start disciplining your children, how about you? Do them matter of fact? Make it easier? Just tell your kids play like there's cars driving through this neighborhood. John Crist is on the Adam Carolla show. Jody Miller as well. Yeah, the other thing I've noticed with those signs where they have the it's like a turtle with Down syndrome in the big and green, they're OK. Tell me if this is your experience. I have only seen them in nice neighborhood. Oh yeah. You go to the s**tty neighborhoods out Pacoima and channelize. Yeah, there's nothing. Oh, I don't have any turtle signs, but I know you judge a neighborhood by the turtle. Do you judge a culture by its how it treats its prisoners and in judging neighborhood by how many r****ded turtle signs telling you to slow down because the kids are fine? Yeah, but here's the thing. When you go into the nice neighborhoods and there and I notice it like I was dropping off one of my daughter's friends, very hoity toity nice neighborhood in Pasadena and stuff. And I got pulled in and there's no sign at the end of the street, you know, kids r****ded turtle, right, Napoleon. And she's like, Oh, we're doing construction. It's like, you know, guys out there and stuff and go, What are we doing? Oh, we're we're doing the backyard. We already got the pool. We already got the pickleball card. We're doing it. My dad sold a jacuzzi. Rich people play in their f**king yards. Oh yeah, have a rich. You're not out there playing stickball in the street are like, Oh, right, they play in the back, they play the ba*s. They have rich Doppler in the bat and they have trampolines. I mean, my kids have a jacuzzis and outdoor kitchens, trampolines, barbecues, pools, half court like we're near the st. Mark. Wahlberg's kids aren't out in the street. They're f**king in the yard. Never, ever f**king. It's like we want to play. Roller hockey in the street will build you a court. We have a get out there. Your car three in the back. You can play that. Don't you remember? There's nothing in the streets, no street plays. And I've driven this. I've driven all over, all over L.A. Go the beautiful neighborhoods the always look out for kids. Never seen, never seen a kid. Never see it. He's got a full F1 race simulator in his f**king bedroom. He's sitting in there, right? He's got outside Grubhub in his lap. Yeah, so someone to feed it to are all out the street and there are no sign. So let me ask you a question, though. When I grew up, there were no signs either. We all played in the street because my mom was in there, waving them into my bedroom and snapping didn't get me. But here's the thing I'm saying to your point. The kids knew. We knew it's dangerous out there. Watch and we would yell car. We knew we were playing kickball. We didn't need signs to sell the cars. We were aware that cars are bigger than us. I will. We should get out of the way. I'm not going to s**t on your point, but I will say this about the day same deal, you know, out in the street. Yes, it is literally zero signs about kids playing in the street where they play in the streets and then nothing but in places where they don't, right? That's the ratio. But cars, when we were kids made a noise. That's true. You would hear cars coming. How many times you just been walk, like when you walk up in the hills. If you're hiking around, like walking the streets, you're in the Malibu to the Hollywood Hills or something. You're just walking and you go, you turn around and there's just like a Tesla right there and you're like, what? How did that get there? We got a heads up because everything had a sound to it. You got to yell when you're you can't just rev your engine in a Tesla. I don't think that's how you can, but you'll run them over. Literally, that'll be the wake up call. Yeah, there's nothing. But yeah, there's nothing for yeah, it's similar to the the camera with the tickets. It's only in rich neighborhoods. You've said that before with the the on the on this, the stoplights at the stop, they give you the tickets right. They only put them where the rich people will pay them right or their assistant will pay them the in the poor neighborhoods to go. Yeah, or just not paying that. So I don't even get their mail. No. So whom? I was talking to Dr. Drew earlier today. But you can tell me if you think this is an accurate statement or not. I had some pediatric nurse guy called in and was telling us all about every kid is on the autism spectrum. Yeah, now. And I'm like, Yeah, because as soon as you create a spectrum, then everyone will be on it in some way, shape or form. You know, like, go go. Does he close? I close my eyes when I'm thinking sometimes like trying to work out math or thought or recover memory. I will close my eyes now if I close my eyes all the time. Then I have full blown autism. But if I close it, when I'm thinking now, I'm on the spectrum because you've created something called a spectrum. And then I said to Dr. Drew, We're all on the spectrum for everything now. But I'm not a I'm not a full blown racist, but I am on the spectrum. I have thoughts. We're all on the spectrum. Yeah. Andrew is like, and I'm not a misogynist, but have thoughts about the lady. You're not on the spectrum. OK. Oh, but you're there. Is that spectrum to you? Straight fandom? And then, yeah, yeah. And so I was saying like, OK, so I said, Drew, you're on the racist spectrum with me. And he said, No, I'm not, you know, they said, Yes, you are. Everyone is. I said, OK, you go to a c**ktail party, you run into a guy who you talk to him for a minute. He tells you he's a half Japanese and half Jewish. And then you go, And what do you do for a living? And he goes, I play professional basketball and you go, Huh? You do. Now you're on the spectrum with me. You're right, you're on this. You can argue about where you are. You haven't your I didn't say close to the front with me. You're not the tip of the spear, but you're on it. Yes. You made it on. It is either it used to be. You are or you're not. Right, right. So if you have Tourette's, you can't do that if you don't. But that's not how that would. It would. Everybody would be on just on the spectrum of something and of everyone. I'm also Asperger's on the spectrum, in the spectrum. OK? Yeah. Or if you go like if you're getting a if I'm getting my haircut by a man and he's done, he's like, You want the shoulder massage? And I go, You're gay. Yeah, like, you wouldn't mind there. You're I wouldn't mind it. Yeah. So right there, you're not like blowjob, but you're like, you're like, Oh man, if you see another guy whose shoulder you see another guy working out. Mm hmm. And you go, Huh? Yeah. Where does that put you? You put it right here, I'm drawing a line that's like, it's a nicely I appreciate that the man has worked hard on his body. And if they say people ask me all the time, where are you on the spectrum? They're already assuming you're on this. I didn't know there was a gay spot, right? Oh, you didn't know there was something about the gay spectrum. Oh my god, that's the biggest conversation. Anybody says, I'm bi, I'm over here on the spectrum, I'm over here. I kissed a girl in college. I'm like, right here on the spectrum. I don't. I think women can be bi. I don't think guys can really be bi. Why can women be bad? Guys can't be by just wandering. I've heard this. I've heard this before, but I'm wondering. I know first off, I always say I used to say on love line that. BI was basically you just saying by the heterosexuality and hell at home? That's why it's bye bye, bye bye. Heterosexually bye bye. And that's why everyone I would say bye is gay with a publicist. They always start, you know, Elton John's bye. But he ain't bye anymore. You know, everyone starts off by because they go. It's good for PR. We're going to boil this frog. So I am like, I'm not going to tell everyone. I chug c**k. Twenty four seven, I'm just going to go, you know, I like the guys and I like the gals and you guys can say, whatever. Yeah, you can sleep with that. Let that sink in. That'll wash over you. And then about six years from now, I'll be marrying a dude. They never go back to. It's an easy transition. All right. OK. Yeah. But women? Well, women for emotional and then physiological practical reasons. OK. You know what I mean? Like, women can engage with other women sexually. A because we've decided that the form is beautiful, the aesthetic for a woman. But we use them for advertising. And if people go, Oh, look at that new Corvette, it's shaped like a beautiful woman, you know what I mean? So we've established it as a as a standard, right? And we've also made it perfectly fine for women to explain that other women are very beautiful and the aesthetic, right? And they don't have a weapon that fires jizz in the middle of their body. You know, for me, it's like there's not much less of a commitment. You know, you do, dude, you're going to get dick in your a*s at some point. That's a thing. And no one, not a straight man has ever gotten drunk or high and thought to themself, I want to make. I think I want to kiss a man. Yeah, right? Never. No, I've never. I can tell you this. Never. And I guess I'm on speaker now better every time I heard. I don't know who you are. You're trying to convince me or you, Todd. Did you guys make out before the show? Well, if I was lucky, he's got to have a sense of humor. Yeah, it's going, guy. Listen to me. I've never I've never experimented in college. I I have never had that urge to kiss a female ever, really not on the spectrum. And here's the thing I and you to bring, you know to your point. Oh yes, we use women. You know, their bodies are beautiful. A lot of straight women actually watch porn and get more turned on when they see the naked woman. All of that stuff. I can tell you right now I have never even in my drunkest, you know, on whatever I I'm out. I've never actually ever been out. And trust me, my one ex-boyfriend was loveless. I was does have a threesome. Look how hot she is. I don't want to kiss her. I don't want to. I don't want her. I don't want to go down on me. I don't want her to touch my boobs. I'm not attracted sexually to a woman, although I can find many women not on the spectrum. But I will say this about Jerry quickly. For people listening, she is an open book with open legs like she will talk. So when she says I've not been with the woman, believe her, I wish she had. You would hear about it. You would hear about it, right? What about I was in Miami one time and they had this like sushi like spread and it was on, Yeah, would you eat sushi off that? Yeah, I don't care about that. I'm not hooking up with our spectrum, would you? If I tell to you, that might put you on it? Listen, I also know a lot of women like you think about it, there's a lot of women that are still uncomfortable if another woman changes in front of her. It's a weird thing. You know what I mean? I don't think I. It bothers me. I can tell you right now my daughter has two and a half, is obsessed with my boobs. She's obsessed with them. Is she on the spectrum? I don't know. She just likes. But eventually we'll find out. Literally, she can be crying. I can be like, Do you want to do this? No. Do you want to do that? No. Do I go, do you want to see my boobies? And she goes, Yes. I mean, she's a college frat boy about my boobs right now. She's all about him. What else is my nuts actually fall short of when she's going to do want to see? Is not sure. Not yet. Wait till I babysit. All right. All right. So now here's another couple of things. First off, the woman in the sushi thing. Oh yeah, it was asked of me like, Yeah, do we're throwing a party? Don't you think this would be cool? Like, Oh, no, I don't think it would be cool. It's it's distracting. She's like a pool table. She's laying there. Also unsanitary is there when you're laying out the sushi. Spicy tuna. That's got to be by the Ariel. That's right. I mean, you've got to take the California roll. Let's get it down by the car. Try to keep the tuna away from the snatch, right? What are you looking at? What's going to be most popular? We're eating. Yeah, but the snapper by the snapper, I'm saying you'd be really? Isn't that more of a guide like the snappers by the snapper? I think you would keep the avocado roll and the California. I think the avocado roll down by the snatch. One Want the stars, maybe on the thighs. I'm just saying I don't remember I would have thoughts about layout. Where does the octopus go? Where's that? Say this is all things. Said, I need to go use the forehead. Is that considered real? It's going to make question. You guys walk into a party, your friend invites you to a party. It's just a normal party. It's not even like a huge celebrity bar. It could be slow, but doesn't matter. You're walking to a party, and there she is. And she's just an average woman, by the way. It's not like she's like, Figure, it's like, Yeah, sushi girl is just laying on the table. Do you would you eat that sushi off her body? I would, but it's I. It's 2023. Like, I don't think we should have this job. Meaning like c**kfighting is illegal in California, but we have. This feels weird. I was out of it still exists. But here's here's a bigger spectrum gay back for a job. Let's get back to the dance with her us. All right, let's go gay spectrum to it. All right. So John and I were clearly on the racist spectrum. That was an argument. Gay. It's a very, very low down, very low down on that. But, you know, if I'm getting a massage, I don't care if it's a man or woman per se. I would probably prefer a woman, prefer a woman. But but the man has bigger, stronger hands. So there's a tradeoff there. But here's the question, John, for guys, all guys, women are applauded, encouraged and rewarded for engaging in this behavior. Oh yeah. Now let's just say societally, we were like drunken and there were some good looking chicks and they're like chanting, If John and Hugh go into the bedroom and let us watch like we will finger ourselves watching you to make out on this bad, that's all you have to do is make out. So you say, Oh, whatever it is, like, get your pants down, lay down on each other, you know, and we'll be watching and we'll be flicking the beam while we're watching. Don't you think more guys would do this? They would already. I think they are. They were already there just waiting for their endorsement. They're born on that spectrum, hanging out like hovering. Yeah. I mean, come on, guys, encourage women. They get all excited. There's a lot of that out. If women do that to men, I think there would be a lot more dudes making out with that this week. That would make me straighter, though. Go, Yeah. Because you're actually doing it for the woman because it's hotter. I feel like I'm a federal agent going undercover to try to at a biker, in a biker gang, you know? Yeah, OK, so I'm trying to be the mole undercover, OK? You get you get cast in this movie, you get cast in a really big movie. It's going to be a really big movie. You know, this is going to be an Oscar nominated winning movie and you have to be gay and, well, it can't be. They're not casting him if he's on the racism spectrum. So he's also on the spectrum. So, oh, you got dirt on him? Yeah, he's been on your podcast. He already knows he's got a Cashman's, but you have to be. You are the gay lead. And I mean, it's it's not just like he's my lover, like, there's going to be a lot of makeup scenes. You're going to be, you know, touching hold. And let's cast Adam Carolla. Yes, because they want that, you know, that type of gay man, right? So do you? And it's a lot of money. It's a lot of money. This could really just like it's just like a really great career move for you. And let's say there's not even that much like physical you just got to because it's got it's not. No, it's not just like, this is my boyfriend. This is my husband. There's going to be a lot of kissing. I don't even like when you touch me acting like a gay man that made me uncomfortable. Okay. But I mean, what's what's what's going to happen when you take that role? Yeah, you take it. Yeah. Are you going to be giddy on the first day or are you going to be like, I got to kiss the dude you're going to practice if he wants to run lines? He's a gay actor and you are straight actor playing, Oh, he's gay now. Did you guys see? Did you guys see last of us? Did we see it? I'm going to be the spoiler and answer you. No, no, we didn't see barely on the spectrum. OK, I saw it. And there's a great storyline and one of the actors happens to be gay and one happens to not be gay. And it's it was actually one of the best episodes in modern fame. Modern Family. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, it's great. Anyway, it's all great and it's a beautiful storyline. But like the one guy almost didn't take the role just because he had other stuff going on, but his wife convinced him to do it. I think the other guy being gay factors in that does. Oh yeah, OK. I think it does. I don't know. So you're not going to do it if the other actor is gay. But if you're both straight, like the like Brokeback Mountain, no Black Mountain, I think, in fact, I don't think that I would do it. Mm hmm. I just really like commit to the role. You've got to help those those like grease up those those weak one your agent calls you with the box office numbers. You like this thing better have gone better. Be going to the Brokeback Mountain came out. Two very straight manly actors never shot one right on the spectrum, never saw saw one question. We've never seen this movie seen him. All right. What about they get so into it that you are like, Wow, if that was me, I mean, like, yeah, they're like, Do the rich behind is a lot. I think it's a reach around whatever it is behind a round. I agree. I would do it if it is a guy if you and all the guys were hanging at a gay guy. This is what I've always thought was funny. And then he's like, I don't really find you attractive. Like, I'm not gay, but like, Wait, what? You know, he's like, Oh, no, I mean, you're a little bit. Yeah, a little. A little. You're like, Wait, you think this guy is like, you know, so you don't at all? Yeah, I think we would all like to be found attractive. And we've also anointed gay men as having the number one aesthetic I in America, my god, you know, gay men and teenage girls. I had this one gay guy. It was like, you are stunning. And to me, it was the best day of my life. When a black guy says Your shoes are cool. Yeah, yeah, oh yeah. Black guy saying you got nice shoes. Oh my god. Nothing better. All right. Other subjects to get into. Let's see. I had a a something I was talking to, something else I was thinking about for a while. I was kind of trying to think of the difference between Biden and Trump. I hear there's there's subtle differences. There's nuances between between the two of them. But I was saying to Dr. Drew the other week and I was thinking about it, I finally did my homework, which is Trump is a blowhard and is pop is a bombastic sort of blowhard. And almost every woman I know hates it because they hate that they hate that he's just a bombastic blowhard. They all and it's an aesthetic. It's like he's got the gut and the hair is big and he's orange. And he's like, Yeah, he's constantly talking to Amanda Massie. Everything is big planes, my bridges, guys and the courses. They hate it. They hate it. And so I know a lot of people are like, I could never vote for that guy because I I hate that guy. And then my thing is like, you should vote for people based on policy because you're doing it loosely on this. First off, everyone who voted for Barack Obama thinking that they would like to have a beer with him. How many actually had a beer with Barack Obama? And the answer zero. Then don't vote based on wanting to have a beer with the person because it's never going to happen. Right? But they will have policies that may affect you and your family, and you should focus on those. And maybe you won't like those either. But let's at least focus on what that is. And then you could go. I agree with that policy. I disagree with that policy, but don't do it based on the beer because that beer will never happen. Yeah. So an inflation, you can't buy beer anyway. That's right. It can't even have one with anybody. So I was thinking about it and I thought the difference between these two guys is, I said. Have there's a clip of Joe Biden that I played before, which is. Unbelievable that nobody really thinks it's unbelievable, but to me, it's insanely unbelievable that he said this. It's from like 20 years ago, but he was running and they were asking him about his scholastic achievements. And he just lied pathologically like insanely narcissistic sociopath sociopathy. He's just he's a sociopath. I mean, he just lied. Insane lie like this one. So there's lying. There's lying. When you get pulled over and the cop goes, Spectrum you, you been drinking tonight. You got out. I have one beer, one beer. I had five hours, but he had one beer. The guy in the lawn who just got done sweating your copper pipes told the paramedic he had one beer, right? But but that's a lie. It's a spectrum. Yeah, it's a spectrum lie. I graduated from Harvard. You're like, No, you didn't. Right, right? You weren't there. There's kind of lying and Trump does that kind of lying. And then there's just completely making s**t up for no good reason, for no reason. You don't have to. So. But first of all, play Trump and this is his he's talking about his college in Wharton School of Finance or whatever. And this is the bombastic, blowhard version of a politician talking about his education. I went to the Wharton School of Finance. I was a very fine student. And I will tell you one of the great schools in the world, the Wharton School of Finance, one of the hardest schools in the world to get into. I got it. Let me tell you, I went there. Oh my God. All right. How many times now as a taxpayer, I'm like, he's a blowhard. Yeah. But if he went to the Wharton School, he still went to the Wharton School. And if his policies are good, then his policies are good. And did he go? He went. I talked to Dr. Drew about, I got a look, look at you, but I wouldn't even care. I don't think anybody cares what school they went to. That, to me, is like. But they did roll if you enrolled in there for a day. That's just an exaggeration. He may have won like as an undergrad or something or something, but all right, he's got us on a technicality. I played again just because it's so, it's so Trumpian, right? So John and I didn't. I said, I know there's clips of him talking about how beautiful the Wharton School is and how great he is. It's out there. I went to the Wharton School of Finance. I was a very fine student and I will tell you one of the great schools in the world, the Wharton School of Finance, one of the hardest schools in the world to get into. I got it. Let me tell you, I went there. All right. So that's Trump and his blowhard E-ZPa*s. He's talking about his education. Right? All right. Now here's Biden talking about his education. You got to kind of turn this one up. I think it's getting to do. The new question stemmed from Typekit remark, said Biden during an April campaign appearance in New Hampshire voters. I went to law school on a full academic scholarship. The only one in my in my class to have a full academic scholarship went back to law school and in fact ended up in the top half of my cla*s. I was the outstanding student in the political science department. At the end of my year, I graduated with three degrees from undergraduate school and a hundred and sixty five credits, only 123 credits. Biden now concedes he did not graduate in the top half of his law school class, that he does not have three degrees from college and that he was not named outstanding political science student in college. Newsweek says Biden actually went to school on a half scholarship and ended up near the bottom of his class and won only one degree, not three. Joe Biden won one is a blowhard, the other is a sociopath. Yeah, that's a f**king insane liar, by the way. Now picture him going, Oh, I never talked to my son about any business. He was that guy, the same guy to say that the guy who said they have three. I said, I said, Dr. Drew, I didn't go to college. Mm-Hmm. I don't know how this works. Could you just think you had a couple extra degrees or went on a full scholarship when you didn't go or graduated the top? And he's like, It's impossible. Yeah, it's impossible. He's a sociopathic liar. Yeah, it's insane. That's a test. And that's before, like, there are some guys that were killing it before the Google era because it's just too bad. Oh yeah, prior to the 90s, you wouldn't. You would have get away with that forever. You'd have to go there, go to the administration building. There is no way to tell when was that recording? When did he make those dates? Probably in the 80s. So yes, you didn't think anybody would ever know. He wouldn't make that. No one would make that statement today because they know it'd be fact checked in a heartbeat. Community notes on Twitter would get him in a second second right. And I get the part where everyone embellishes and fudge is, but he's manufacturing degrees. Yeah, that place. Strangest part, the part saying I was outstanding. I mean, in his mind, maybe that's what he thinks even. No, he wasn't. He didn't get a full scholarship, we got a half scholarship. But saying I have three degrees, so also I don't know anybody else. Three. You graduate, you don't. They don't give you three degrees. You deserve more degrees. It's like you could have a double major, I guess, but you don't have like three degrees. Well, that is that is the difference between the two in my home. I do want to point out, though, because you brought up the people are voting for people because they like them or they want to have a beer with them or they're attractive. Yes, and that definitely started with JFK. If you look at the president before JFK, we didn't find him attractive or easily, but we didn't. We did have never seen him. Photo of him the way, the way Adam said yes. When I said yes, yeah. So into that, oh yeah, that literally was the first. They were like, Look at this young. A guy is not you everyone else, but everybody was, yes, girls wanted to marry him. And they he he presided over Camelot. Yes, that's what I mean. It's like, that's like a fairy tale. And then everything after that was like and then kind of went back to the old white man, look, we don't want to f**k him. And then, you know, Barack came around and we're like, Oh, I forgive him. Yeah. Mm hmm. Say you want to? Oh hey. I mean, if you did it yourself, watch us. We would make out. Well, you had a beer. Yeah, is did. Well, you want like your agents who you always talk about, like they're like, they're a jerk to me, but to who their agent thing to you want them to be a jerk to them? Yes, like Adams Adams not doing it for this money. You want them to go that quality that is like, Hey, we're not doing this. We need more. It's tough to see it from you, but you in diplomatic situations at the U.N., we do want to send a guy over there. It's like, now, listen, we're not doing that. Yes, I keep think, yes, I said this Alec Baldwin a million years ago when he was talking about he is kind of dipping his toe in politics and stuff like that. And I said to him, these countries that are bully countries that I was thinking probably mainly more Middle Eastern countries back then. You know, when you say to those people like, Look, we don't want a problem, they go, Oh, he's a pussy, like, he's weak. Like, say, look at people are weak and they actually physically think of women as weak or they see a guy not big in stature. They really only understand big, erratic, nutty and angry. Yeah. And when they now it's not like Obama or Hillary Clinton couldn't launch nukes. It just somehow they'd look at them and they go, He's that guy. He's not getting it. He's he's weak. And I always just tell Baldwin he needed. This is 20 years ago. Pack on the way, get a big barrel chest, grow a big beard, wear an old timey suit with like a pocket watch, right? And stuff, you know? And then like, he could get in and he would just yell at these banana dictators and he'd yell at all these Middle Eastern guys and stuff. And then at some point he'd check his pocket watch and say, I said, good day and he'd storm off or maybe more or sword or something, you know, and they'd be scared s**tless. And yes, I think there was an element of that with Trump, like the boss is, the boss is coming into work, so he's nuts. Yeah, no one call in and say they're on there, period. Check if you're coming in bleeding or not. Oh yeah. He'll go full Megyn Kelly on, you know, bring it in full circle to the the the cycle. All right. That was a good line. Where the hell are we going to do some news? All right. Yeah. All right. We'll take a break. We'll come back. We'll do some news right after this. Let me tell you about Angie homeowners. You know, it's a lot of work down a home, whether it's everyday maintenance repairs or dream projects. It can be hard to even know where to start. All you need is Angie your home for everything home. Find a skilled local pro who will deliver quality and experience over 20 years of home service experience. Bring them your project online or with the Angie app. Answer a few questions, and Angie handles the rest. Look, you're busy. 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You can even have your order shipped directly to your doorstep, giving you the freedom of shopping on your schedule. Stop by O'Reilly Auto Parts today or visit O'Reilly Auto dot com. It's time for Nicaraguan name that movie with Adams, Buddy Oswaldo. See if you can guess which movie this famous line is from. I wish I knew, will you quick view. If you said Brokeback Mountain, I wish I knew how to quit you. You're correct. Now back to the show. John, then Jodie Skinny, Jodi Miller. Oh yeah, yeah. Least gay Hollywood male, female comedic team. Ever, ever to be assembled straight in this room. Yep, not nearly on the spectrum are in studio Chris from. Got some news? Oh yeah, hi. Well, I did have a complaint about the Ice House that will not involve tooting my own horn, but possibly which is get into it. I live in locking you out of California. Yes, for many years, I lamented that the Ice House was closed. It was closed down for years. The COVID f**ked it up and then they remodel the neighborhood right away. And I said, it's the only comedy club that's within striking distance of my house because I have to go from my house to the improv on Melrose to the comedy store and a laugh factory. It is a forty five minute drive each way. It couldn't be further away. Yeah. All right. And then at some point they reopen the ice house and I said, Now I shall rejoice, I shall rejoice. But I then got booked at the Ice House. And each time I've been booked at the Ice House, I've not been in lock in Europe because I'm splitting my time between Malibu, California and lock and yard. And the last two times I've been there, I've been in Malibu. So now I have to drive from Malibu, California to Pasadena, which is much further than it would have been to go from lock in yard to the comedy store. Conditions were so bad for you, for a sold out performance. I just. Are you okay? I feel so bad. I think this is the only city where you split time between two homes in the same city. Yeah, it's usually like, dude, I got to go down to Minneapolis, but I'm in St. Paul, and it's like, right now we have two two of them in the same city. All right. So believe me, we all have problems. Well, speaking of how hot JFK was? Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey. We did not say we know what we did. I did watch the Last of US episode the from, and I loved it anyway. So great. So there's there's these videos have been coming out of Robert F. Kennedy Jr.. Mm hmm. Just looking jacked. Really? Oh yeah. Yeah. Over the weekend, he put up these these videos. Me and Adam don't know what you're talking about. I did not want to know nothing. I want to see it. So he put the caption quote, Getting in shape for my debates with President Biden and the first one, he's he's doing a bench press and this is at Gold's Gym in Venice. Wow, he better watch himself with Biden because I saw a presser that he did in the 80s, he said of his Mr. Olympia. To have our sex series, titled Tied Running the Universe, had set the squat bench and clean record at Vanderbilt and sixty one. That's what he said. Oh, you know, top of yeah, sorry. Yeah. So watch you play. You got played. So yeah, here's him. How old is he? He's almost seven. Sixty nine. Wow. He looks great. Yeah, look at that upper body and and working out in jeans. Yeah, that's a turnoff, though. I get that. It's like the shirtless gene that's a turtle like people who work out in street clothes. He actually looks exactly like a G.I. Joe action figure. Yeah. Does know you know who he is. He's Ned Flanders. Oh, yeah, yeah. Yeah. You can't tell when he has, is his suit on. That's what Ned Flanders had to pull the windbreaker off and he was jacked. Play the pushups. And there's also there's also one of him doing some well, OK, well, belt, we get it. But listen, you know, he when he would come in here, he's been in here a couple of times. I think Todd, he's one of these guys who came in and I was like, This guy's yoked. I can see I can. You can tell your spectrum that you saw the outline of his muscles. He's got a thin waist and a big, big, big upper body, definitely taking human hormone HGH. There is suspicion. There definitely is. It's obvious in this book he looks good. It looks better than some of the other guys are taking whatever take, we have to say. But he looks good. Yeah, OK, so well, where is this muscle beach? So where this is? There's somewhere where it is the. I haven't take my shirt off. Where does that, where does that conversation go? Hey, you want the cameras? We got some cameras here. Do you want to? Well, it's brought the camera. I'm not going to take my shirt off. If I if I had that bottom, I sure would be sure about that right now. Yeah. Well, here's the question then. He's wearing jeans and a belt didn't prepare. You can take a dress shirt off because you can go. I'm motivated to take my dress shirt off, but if you're wearing a t shirt, then you should leave it on because you're already working out. You want to stay with you. Yeah, look what he's done. Yeah, he's comparing himself to buy it. And this is this is a jab in that. In that case, because I was going to say those, if you go back to that weight lifting, that's an incline. And those aren't 45s. I think those are those that's yeah, those are any small or 15. But if you're comparing yourself to that's I mean, we could all do that. Yeah, that meant a weight, but not at that age. And if you're comparing yourself to Biden now and he does, how many does he do before he gets like seven reps and then the guy starts clearly works out. I mean, he does enough to keep his body in that shape, which is good or yeah, he does four or five. Yeah, yeah, good. Well, either way, just somebody. You know, again, I just when I see people at the gym and they're in jeans or industry because I like want to scream, I don't know what it is. It really upsets me for some reason. But can it be harder? Like, did you see Connor Air? Yeah, Comic Con Air Nick Cave. They then they they crash, landed, the plane got stuck and a bunch of like a dirt embankment. Yeah, and all the dudes had to take the shirt off, but they had the prison jeans on and they had to like tow it out of the dirt. I'm not even on a spectacular show there. I'm talking about when I'm actually I went to the gym, I'm in my workout clothes and people off the street come to work out. They're clearly coming to the gym. I know their gym and they're wearing jeans. I don't like it. It bothers me. So much upsets me. Almost for some reason. It's like it's out of it's not right. The the Top Gun volleyball scene. Not doing anything for you. No, no. I'm saying I like men with their shirts off. In fact, my one boyfriend was so hot when I was like 25 26. We were meeting friends for brunch outside. It's a nice place, and I just said to him, Take your shirt off. He's like, I go to take off. And so I don't want to be sure of it's like, we're at brunch. And I convinced him to take it off because I wanted my friends to see his body. Wow. In 2020. He did it. Good for him. And yeah, I look at the kind of air cast with the shirts off and the dungarees. Now that f**king who's in, who's in charge of pulling up the who's in charge of the image the band did Ben? Did Ben find that a little too quick? Yeah, it was honest. Yeah, you do. Oh, I got it. Don't it slide? He didn't seem like he had to search it. He didn't seem like he had to search it. All right. Anyway, he's yeah. Good for him. Yeah, that's nice. All right. He's not going to debate. Biden's not going to debate by not leaving the House. Yeah, but all right. So the biggest the biggest news at this moment is would they found a new host for Wheel of Fortune? Oh, wow. Yeah, that's quick. It's quick. It's Ryan Seacrest. Yeah, oh man. Yeah. So he just you just announced that's enough. You still like Kelly and Ryan, too. No, he left. And that, yeah. Mm hmm. Free agent. Yeah. Forty eight years old. Yeah, just left to live with Kelly and Ryan. We put up a statement on his on his Twitter just saying, you have to turn the letters to read it, right? Yeah, I'm truly humbled to be stepping in the footsteps of the legendary Pat Sajak. I can say, along with the rest of America, that it's been a privilege and pure joy to watch patent Vanna on our television screens for an unprecedented 40 years, making us smile every night and feel right at home with them. Pat, I love the way you've always celebrated the contestants and made viewers at home feel at ease. I look forward to learning everything I can from you during this transition. Many people probably don't know this, but one of my first jobs is hosting a little game show called Click for Merv Griffin 25 years ago. So this is truly full circle spectrum. Merv was on that spectrum by now. It was way to the apprentice. Yeah, so and he says, I can't wait to so vanishing on saying I just trying to renegotiate her contract. But there's that line that's leaving. She has a year left back leaving because he just leave. Yeah. You know, I think I think Pat is just borderline going to get canceled. Turkey is not a nice person and such a nice not get out while you can. What is he like? I like I align with a right winger. Yeah. Oh, that's all I am saying. I'm just saying. I heard it's just not nice on set to people. That's what I've heard. I don't know. Maybe it does anyone. I mean, I know you have the money. I know you have the notoriety. I know you have the consistency in terms of your job. But do you really want that career? Which is just forever this people didn't think he was going to have that career forever, like Drew Carey is doing him and Wayne Brady does it the same, the daytime game shows. But they actually their career was like, you know, they had a career as a comic and they were touring. And then they went to this because they wanted they want stability and they wanted the money. Yeah. Pat started it. This that was this is like one and only thing I have ever carry on my Mount Rushmore of most money for at least funny a coup physically. Who else is on there? Well, most money. I mean, you'd have to you have to really do it like a deep dive. Like, like Kevin Hart is not funny, but he's a really funny actor for this like stand isn't very funny, but he's a super hard working guy, a businessman and stuff like that. So Tyler Perry, he's like off that list. Tyler Perry just bought Bet and VH one. Oh, he got it. Yeah. Oh, by now vying for that? Well, there's always this might be I don't. As a comic, I feel like people love to glorify the comics that that passed away. Like, my favorite comic was Robin Williams. Nobody loved Bob Saget when he was alive. That's what I sound like. A douche. No, I agree. Look, I knew everyone Bob Saget knew and everyone agreed. He was the nicest guy in the world and everyone loved by fan. No serious s**t, a comedian. They've never said anything good about this comedy. They're just like, Oh, Bob's a great guy. Yeah, we love Bob Bob. I'll do as a fan. I'll do whatever everyone loved. Bob Saget But they didn't do the Oh, he was a great comedian. Right? But when you die. Same with Brody over at the Comedy Store. I'm like, Yes. And this isn't about is the guy. They like them, the glasses and the long hair. Whatever they did, the one liners on The Tonight Show all the time, and it was like, This is the greatest. Wow, what's his name? And it's the same way. Think about hold on glasses, long hair, long hair. How long ago did Emo Phillips know? I tried to write my name. I was going to get a. I was going to get my teeth cleaned. Instead, I just got a tan. Thanks. Mitch Hedberg Yeah, my bad. But but yeah, when you want, it's cool to say, Oh, you know who I like? Oh yeah. But they are. They're not here anymore. It's like a nobody. When I was coming up, I didn't hear much. I love Robin Williams. Mm hmm. And now one of the best. Right? Because it's it. Yeah, I mean that that that that happens. That's why I'm going to be worshiped after. I think it has to be an untimely death. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. So timely. Yes. Having said that, yeah, I saw I mean, I've seen as you probably have Robin at the Comedy Store. I remember it was a while ago, but he was working on an hour. And I mean, I think he was a brilliant actor. I think he was. You annoying? Some disagree with that. And his comedy, I mean, the first five, 10 minutes, people were just laughing because it's Robin Williams and he's being really goofy. And then he started getting into his material and I was like, This is awful. And nobody was like, Yeah, yeah, yeah, nobody else. I was just like, Who else is dead that we hate? Oh, Geraldo. But he was a nice guy. Yeah, like Geraldo, I'm going to say, had what's the name of the black guy that they always did the the fundraiser for every year with Bill Burr and oh, Patrice, Patrice Patrice is a great comic. All right, so let's just say this, so we're not being disrespectful. Everyone's gone. There are people that are immense talents like you think, Robin, he's in a men's, has a crazy talent. And I think if 'cause Kevin Hart that way too, like it's a great talent, it works his a*s off or whatever. Yeah. Never. Not a fan of the stand up. Fine. And yes, we do have to do this thing. There's Alex Trebek is one of like he died. Yeah, no one. But the people that do the game shows were millionaires with too much reverence for them. That's certainly love Alex, but I, you know, I don't care about so where do you put it? Where do you put him in the pantheon of now? Now I look when people are worried about Jamie Fox. Yeah, they mean it. What is going on? Yeah, nothing good. But the point is that they go, That guy's a counts, guys. I'm a monster. Alan, nice guy. That's another thing. He's not just being nice because there's an issue that is when they die while in, they're not prime. But while they still have a lot of good years left. Yeah, yeah. Kurt Cobain is also one of. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. All right. So there's there's a new study, math and reading scores among America's 13 year olds have fallen to their lowest levels in the way. I don't believe that I know this can't be. This is not the onion with math scores plunging by the largest margin ever recorded, right? Yeah, according to the results of a federal. Has known as the nation's report. Yes. OK, thank you. Makes sense. School teachers unions have closed the schools down for two years and f**ked all the kids up. All the brown and black kids use these you claim to care about. You just mortgage their future as a dog because you're greedy a*****es when it usually adults can work from home. We barely do it, and now you can be an a*s and say, Hey, kids, you stay at home and everybody's on their iPads. Or so the games and the YouTube is a go into your room and do your math. Yeah, sounds good. I have no social interaction. See it at your friends and everybody started like even the top performing students also, says Grace. And in the low performances, so an even bigger decrease, a bigger margin of increase. The hope is that is that Roberta Weintraub? Yeah, that's Randi Randi Weingarten. Why we screw up Randi Weingarten, songbird our nation as a proponent for closing schools, as the leader of unions. If you guys don't think these unions are bad. Think about how much control they have. No f**king telling. Rochelle Walensky at the CDC to go rework her story about opening schools. That's how much power they yield. And she just got appointed to like the National Homeland Security Council or whatever. Like that, it is insane. You f**king coward, hypocrite. Horrible, horrible teachers unions. I told you in real time this was a horrible idea. I disagreed with you. You called me like an elitist and a racist and f**king. And you could one of you spineless pussies come onto the show and let's have a debate about it. Or are you just going to cower? I think you need to do some push ups. I mean, Jesus f**king Christ. I just said it. But here's the other thing, too. And here's what I want to say. And then I want to be done being angry. Forget about me. Forget about me. They close the schools. I said, that's a horrible idea, and it never had anything to do with kids. COVID didn't affect kids. It was always about the elderly. They hit that from you. They did not share that information with you. When the dust settles on COVID, and it is all the information that's coming in as it did not affect kids in a negative way. The percentages for like people under 19 or point were zero point zero zero zero three zeros in a six point three. It did not kill young people. It never did. They knew it. They knew it early and they didn't say s**t about it. And so. All right. MSNBC, CNN, L.A. Times, New York Times. You all have f**king blood on your hands because you could have found out the answer. I knew it. And I was told to shut up. Over and over again, I knew what eight days in when we didn't get numbers reported when I wasn't getting the ages of people who are dying. I was immediately suspicious. I put a tweet out, said it kills old people and sick people and the rescue. He's got it. Everyone attacked me. I told to suck my dick and still tell him to suck my dick. Go find the tweet and tell me I'm f**king wrong. You liars. But here's the real question. It's not the L.A. Unified School District. It's not Gavin Newsom. Yeah, it's not Mayor Garcetti. It's not. Roberta Weintraub or Randi Weingarten or a f**king. It's not. Rochelle Walensky. It's not Foushee. It's not anyone who's in on it. It's not everyone who's in on it. It's not them. It's not the CDC. It's not the Wuhan health department. It's not any of it. What the f**k happened to people? LeBron James? Where were you? You f**king coward. Where were the celebrities? Yeah. Where were the late night show hosts? Where were the tastemakers? Where are the f**king rappers? Where were you, people? Where were the comedians? Your f**king cowards? I said it. I said it over and over again. I got f**king attacked over and over again. I got nothing where we're all you cowards. Where were the where were the guys who run Netflix? Where were all the big names? Where the f**k was the rock? Where was Kevin Hart? Where were you, people? If you guys had chimed in. They would have f**king turned. Yeah, they would have reversed course immediately. If LeBron James and Barack Obama, Michelle Obama and Oprah and all the f**king tastemakers, if you f**king cowards had chimed in early when you knew what was going on, then they would have turned. But you wouldn't do it because you wanted your f**king money. You pussies. Thank you. That's all I have to say on that. Now, keep going. Jesus f**king Christ, where was everybody? The people fold immediately, fold immediately. They were all scared. They're all scared. But the politicians would have turned it around if LeBron James and all the tastemakers would have f**king piped. Nobody wanted to take that f**king radio silence except for telling me to shut up. Yeah, they say on the other side, right? I remember from an article on Substack where this girl, Substack was like the only place you could put anything back in, like 2020. And she was this whole long. And she said all of the celebrities and all these blue check marks were deeming her privately like, Thank you, thank you for. Saying this, and she was just going. Yes, yes, help me. Yeah. But yet they go, We can't, we can't. But but we agree. Right. And then you're going to end this. This news here is these type of articles are going to be coming out for the next 20 years. So these people's health, their mental health, depression is isolation. Oh, I'm not going to go to school. Oh, not going to work. The GDP of the country is down. The production is down like all the. Yes. You can't get a Range Rover because they don't have the rivets because nobody was making them for two years. Everything is backed up. Yeah. People from Netflix, nobody there. We're going to speak up. They were making so much money. They mean so much. I mean, how much in TV? There are so many people that pacemakers could if, if, if the Obama, Oprah, if LeBron James, if like people, all the money, if the tastemakers f**kin said something, they would have stopped. But they wouldn't do it because they're f**king cowards. They're so scared. They're scared that they would get canceled. Some of them actually believe it because they were, like, completely petrified. Yeah. All right. There's a related article that the talent of the skateboarders in Venice Beach is also declining. Because they had sand, they had sand in the skate park for two years. They can't do as many kick flips as they used to f**king say, but the work they've done now is they've done Kennedy out. They're all jacked up. I know you wanted to skate king jeans. This is what happens is what happens before I move on. So you want to know the the students are almost every race and ethnicity saw the math course slide, but the steepest drops. Hmm. American Indian students were number one. Whoever is lowest on the totem pole, sorry, whoever's lowest gets hurt the most. That's the way. That's the way they were. Yeah, yeah. Their lowest. They're lower than black, they're lower than Hispanic and always and have been on this education, so they get hurt the most. And then, of course, the people with parents and tutors and private schools and Gavin Newsom's kids, they go to private schools. Same with, same with the comics. I mean, like we all had, I do a lot of videos online in the podcast that we we the comics that were working, survived and the young up and coming open. They all went to UberEats. Or they all went. They don't. Yeah, now they do. And they never came back. Also, a lot of them, they just never came from. A lot of them left. And it's, yeah, it was sad. And yeah, because we could we could. We could back home. We could. Yeah, they all that. We could survive a couple of months now and come back. I think the younger one, some of the younger ones that I know stayed in it. I mean, they left and then they came back. It was the ones that are in the middle, not the ones that are on really making a lot of money and now the ones that are making nothing already. It was the ones in the middle that were kind of getting by and close to maybe getting something. They had a little bit of money, didn't have a job, other job otherwise, because they could go on the road for three months would take them out of business. Yeah, three months easily. I had a lot of friends that called me and were like their entire schedule was canceled and that was their their entire year. And yeah, yeah, it's all going to be about age is all going to be about kids all day, about cover up of kids. I said from the very beginning, that's where shall remain. Here we are all that early. That's what I said. Black students. No, till now, of course. Then white students and then still Asian students held even. Yes, parents can. Of course they did. And yeah, by the way, the share of students missing five or more days of school in a month have doubled since. Yes. Yes, we talked about the beginning of the episode. Unintended consequences. Yeah, which I knew. And by the way, where when you're in education, you're supposed to see these things coming down the road f**king r****d? Yes. Yeah. All right. So Don Lemon just gave his first interview since his CNN. One gives a s**t. Oh no. He's a wild boy. ABC 24 Memphis Your first interview Did you hear what Don Lemon said? Unless he said something stupid? Oh, because he got fired. This is the first interview since his CNN firing. Yeah, yeah. So he opened up in a sit down interview two months after the firing. So here it is. Is that him? No, this is the interview. That's he's been fire. So different. This guy kind of looks like him. All right. So don, you say, for those concerned about your departure from CNN, it fundamentally came down to truth and responsibility. I have a responsibility not only as a journalist, but as an American to tell the truth. They've lied about COVID for three years. Promises of the Constitution because the Constitution is not a perfect union. I'm not a perfect person. No one is. Once I planned things like a hotel constitution deserves us to. We we, in order to fulfill the promise of the Constitution, you're going to stand up for what clip art you stand up for the truth. Who are these f**king a*****es who were cheering when every small business was shut down and every skate park was buried with sand, it was like stand up and cheering, screaming about wanting some woman who owned a salon in Texas. Down and s**t, and then they start talking about the constitutional rights and. f**k right off. Number one, he said My least favorite thing where he goes, I'm not perfect. Nobody has just shut the f**k up. Shut up. I never want to hear that from another human being. We got it. It's called the Grays. Yes. Nobody's perfect. Got it. But you can still murder people, and I don't want to be included with the imperfections of murderers. Yeah. That's the perfect spectrum that seemed like that seemed like a little bit of like Tucker is gone on his show on Twitter, and it's he has a he has a nice set up and he's got a crew there, and it like that seemed a little bit like a Hampton Inn. Yeah. They weren't even in the same room, and it also seemed like in a conference was like, Hey, I'll do an interview, but like with one of my like college frat. But it's like, I don't want to be pulled to the carpet on any of that as an insider. Yeah, that's totally pulling into the carpet on I. You will never hear from Don. I mean, you'll hear from Don Lemon, but I want to hear from Don Lemon, like I want to hear from Ryan Seacrest, which is not at all. You have nothing to say on line one right here. Hey, it's weird that you have a job where we think we want to hear from you. We don't. We won't. We will not hear from them. You will hear from Tucker Carlson. You'll not hear from Don Lemon and Don Lemon had his own show. He was the guy in, and now he's he's he's a narcissistic idiot. Well, not a lot of those guys, which is similar because it's it's similar to this podcast, really. And a lot of like if you look on the top podcast charts, it's all like Matt Walsh, Ben Shapiro, Dan, but like all these super super, right? Mm hmm. And then they have like audiences, but who's the guy that was hooking up with his secretary or whatever and locking the door from the inside on TBS? Lauer Yes. Lauer Nice. Matt Lauer. Yeah, Matt Lauer. So him and these nothing to say no, because they don't say anything. Well, they repeat a company line that already line. And what they're saying about Koven is just saying nothing. They're saying the f**king same s**t everyone told them to say. So they have nothing to say. They have no. So they those guys, when they get canceled, are taken off. Like all of us, I would include us and all those guys I mentioned in you. We have a fanbase, so fans follow us. We don't if if we if Matt Lauer is gone from CBS, he's gone. He's gone, he's don lemon. All his stuff because he doesn't have any. No one cares about what he's done, how he's from The Bachelor. He's no one gives a f**k what that guy is doing that people don't understand. You fire Chris Harrison from The Bachelor. He's calling us insane. He's gone, and he's replaceable. Never. Lauer's gone. Don Lemon is gone. Their mouth f**king pieces. And that's what you earned. And you heard that about Tucker, whether you agree or disagree. He was always going back and forth with with. And they were like, fired him because he didn't follow the narrative. He's like, I'm going to be honest, this is what I think. And he has seven million followers. It's not right or left, per se. I agree. It's like Bill Maher has something to say. Yes. Don Lemon has nothing say they're both Democrats. One of them is just a party line f**king hack. And the other one has opinions. So you can't anybody on the view. Nothing. Nothing like this is their thing. What have you done? Don't get me going. I'm sorry. Sorry, sorry. All right. What have you done? Tom Sawyer is out there who is the founder of Cops Comedy Club. There's a really I'm going to be. What am I going to be? A cops and we'll figure it out. Anyway, it's a great club. There's a great doctors involve us, so we'll bring him in and we'll talk about comedy and comedy clubs right after this. Let me tell you about tomorrow. Innovative. It's the world's largest car sharing marketplace with Tara. You can book any car you want wherever you want. From a community of local hosts, browse a huge selection of vehicles for just about any occasion or budget. Book an SUV or minivan for a family road trip, pickup truck for some errands or even test drive an EV. Every trip is backed by liability insurance. Terms, conditions and exclusions apply. Find your drive. Forget your boring rental cars at Turo Tue Aaro dot com. See what streaming free all month long during Amplify AAPI Voices on Pluto TV watch shows like Kim's Convenience with seemingly new and amazing movies like Meet the Patels and Jason Momoa in Braven. Plus, Pluto TV has hundreds of channels with thousands more movies and TV shows available on live and on demand. Download Pluto TV on all your favorite devices for free Pluto TV. Stream now. Pay Never. And now Alcoa presents definitely not a Jew. On the Adam Carolla show, Dateline Tisdale, Saskatchewan, a 34 year old man was charged with dangerous operation of an aircraft. After landing his helicopter on a high school parking lot so his passenger could go to Dairy Queen. Definitely not a Jew. Tom Sawyer has joined us in the studio. There's a documentary out that I recommend highly called the comedy club. It's streaming now on digital platforms and it's got the late, great Bob Saget in it. Dana Carvey is in it. Bobcat Goldthwait, Paula Poundstone many of the luminaries and comedians that made made while comedy what it is today and Cobb's. Good to see you. Oh, good to see you. Thanks for having me. Yeah. So Cobb's legendary comedy club and in San Francisco had a real scene like back in the day, kind of almost what Seattle was for music. Later in the 90s, but 80s and 90s. But yeah, and we started in the 80s. It was a little it was actually a little bar called Cobb's pub because people always go, where did the name come from? It was just a bar called Cobb's pub, and then we they were doing comedy there. I started out as a comic and I sucked at it, but I knew when to get out. That's the important thing. But I was there and I kept seeing how the shows were so terrible. So I kept whispering in the owner's ear, I could do a better job. And eventually he let me do it. And within a year, we turn the club around from a place that was about 30 percent capacity to 90 90 percent capacity every night. What were you seeing that you thought you could fix? Well, first of all, I thought it was the comedy around the country. There are so many great comedians around the country that were being blocked out of the scene. It was really a local scene, and I really wanted to bring in the best of the best, not just the local comics who were great like Carvey and Poundstone. And, you know, Bobby Slayton and these guys were the hot comics on the scene at the time or so many of them. And by bringing in Bob Saget, Bill Maher and Richard Lewis Seinfeld. And then we're 110 seat room, right? And the punchline is double our size and we're paying the headliners more money. Oh, right. Just yeah, at that time, what year this this is 1982 1983 is like when we really exploded. And yeah, it turned into a scene my buddy dearly departed fill up the juggler, his name is Philip Welfare, and he juggled that there, but he was like in theaters, a street scene like people would perform. You started out as a street performer in San Francisco. A lot of people don't know that he did an act with his dog and and there was. Yeah, so there was a really vibrant justice scene for music as well as comedy and and street street scene and everything. Yeah. Paula Poundstone is a really funny up who I believe was the recipient, but somebody's got to look this up. There's some people that had like good timing and bad timing. I like Newsday's, right? Like Farrah Fawcett dies, but Michael Jackson dies 10 minutes later. And yes, it's all. I mean, Farrah Fawcett is the biggest part of my youth. Yeah. But if Michael Jackson is going to die later that day, you ain't getting you ain't getting a lot of fear. Yeah, but a year goes by and people like their is not dead. It's like, Yes, yes, she just died of rectal cancer, you know, which is a terrible way to go. Nobody wanted to talk about the hottest woman dying that Michael Jackson said. But you know, Paula Poundstone had had a crazy story about like foster kids and maybe being drunk. And there was like all those old Mischa gosh about it. And she was going to court the day and it was, I don't know, it was like the day nine eleven happened before or the day, you know, there were some. There were some big Paula Poundstone scuttlebutt, but something knocked her down under the fold. Right? Some some things. So a lot of it can be the news cycle. Yeah, they're still doing that today. Yeah. Yeah. Oh yeah. When Paula is still an amazing comic and the amazing thing about Paula, as she would talk about exactly what happened on stage, she would, and she would make it funny that that to me, is what being a Kobs comic was all about as being real, Paula. Something could happen to Paula, like five minutes before she go on stage and she could do ten minutes on it. Right? Yeah. And that's that's a gift. The original Matt Rife. Yeah, she is just brilliant at that. And Bill Burrard says is like that, too. I mean, Bill is just funny in the moment. Always. And yeah, that's the my question would be if in 1982 and you had these local comics, how are you? How were you hearing about everybody else? Well, it's if you're a fan of comedy, which I was, I was a big fan of comedy. I was watching Showtime. I like it. But Showtime, right? They had, you know, Denny Johnson and there were Tim Thompson. I just telling people, I actually booked Tim Thompson. I don't know if you remember Tim. I don't remember Tim Thomas, who was in a great movie with Gene Hackman called Uncommon Valor. Oh yeah, I know the movie. Yeah, he was a standup and he but he was a 20 minute standup. He was a showcase stand up in L.A. Yeah. So he booked him out there and we are all our headliners are doing, like 50 minutes to an hour, right? Yeah. Tim Tim's doing his stagecoach coach beard, which is in in 15 minutes and the owner's like, doesn't he wrap up with this? Like, Oh, it's oh yeah. So yeah, he did. And so for the rest of the week, it was guest comics and everybody stretching time. Yeah, yeah. Where were you? Like who? And Matt, I mean, these names. But who do you remember is like watching and going, Oh, wow, this person is really Sam Kennison, talented Sam Kinison, a friend of mine, Rob Becker, who did defending the case and was living out here, and he saw Sam at the Comedy Store, told me, I have to go see, I have to see this guy and this is before the beret and the overcoat and everything. And I saw him, he just blew my mind and I off the first time I ever offered anybody a two week engagement at Cobb's. Oh wow. And the first week was the Angel. The second week was the devil. So I got the whole Sam Kinison effect and the only two weeks he played the club because I ended up having to fire him from the next time he was going to play. What was he doing? You'll have that. Have that. What? What was he doing with drugs or? Well, I mean, I listen. I stopped doing it, but one of the best things to do is when you when you travel around and you play the clubs and you meet there, the manager and sometimes the theatre, sometimes club, but you always have to ask you the biggest pain in the a*s. Oh yeah. You know, who do you guys know me like? Eddie Griffin needed two pairs of brand new Nike tennis shoes in white and of course, one. Did he wear them? No, it's like. And the limo that picked us up needed and picked him up, needed to be white, and he needed a, you know, a carton of Marlboro, whatever. And like desi smoke, like, no, no. I just needed to run around and do all this crazy rider s**t. And I obviously it's insane. I was like, I. I ordered the hummus platter and thought I was going to get yelled at, but I should have been ordering. Tennis shoes might do. But you got to give us some of the riders. I mean. Well, I did book Eddie, and actually we went around and around on that and I just finally went, You realize that Eddie's paying for the shoes. I mean, he's just not paying for the shoes because that's in the when I'm kind of doing this thing, they're inexpensive. You bring as many guys as you want, as many hotels as you want. They're paying for them, right? Do you understand? It could be making 20000. Instead, they're making 15000 because they have $5000 worth of expenses that they shouldn't have. Did he say he wanted the brand new tennis shoes? Does he mean? Well, actually the the thing with Sam being the devil, they started with something that he demanded on the second week after we did a ton of promotion. Nobody knew who he was. We had critics come in, they went bananas for him. Everything was sold out. Two weeks were sold out. We sold it out. Second week, he calls and he goes, I want you to fly up so-and-so. And I go, Well, I don't have the money to fly up so-and-so because, you know, we're all on a really tight budget here and I get 20 percent of the door. That's what I live on. And so I'm not going to take, you know, money out of my pocket to fly your friend up. You're welcome to fly your friend up, you know, and he'll stay with you. That's great, right? But he said, OK, fine. And then I'm at the airport. This is the old days when I went to pick up people at the airport, not before limos and stuff like that. And I guess if they were going to be there or not, yeah, if there is a delay, circle around. So he's supposed to show up at 3:30 and I get a call. Tom Sawyer Blue Courtesy Vogel. And next thing is the owner going, Hey, Sam called, he missed his flight. It's going to be on the next flight, OK? So this went on till 9:30. Oh my god. 9:30 finally gets off the plane. It's like quarter to 10. And I go, What the f**k is your problem with airplanes? And he jumps on, you know, those those seats that are all attached to the floor. He jumps on it like the the, you know, pointing at me, like the finger of God going, You say, you see another f**king word, Mr.? Oh, well, the next plane back to L.A.. Shut the f**k up. Wow, that's pretty good. Kennison High. So but it's a Kennison you're waiting for. This is a Kennison. That's Kennison. Oh, you did the Kennison. That's Kennison getting off the plane for a nine o'clock show at at. Oh, I thought you're picking up his friend. No, picking up a good Kennison. So he got off at nine o'clock. For what time is the show? He got off the plane at 9:45 for a nine o'clock show, so he missed the show. No, we were. We were stretching. Oh my god. Yeah. Had Larry Bubbles Brown out there doing 40 cent, Larry? I just had you coming back from the airport takes forever. Oh my God, but you got him there and he's all right. And it was a quiet ride to the cloud, and it was Paula Poundstone charged with child endangerment for driving while intoxicated with children in the car. An inappropriate touching. A 911 that that was she was. So she actually that was she was lucky. She entered the plea on nine 12. I'm just saying if there was ever a time, something's going to be appropriate with a kid. It's 911. Yes. No one has the memory of it. Yes, for me, because I hang on child endangerment, saying, you know, it ends up like Farrah Fawcett ends up being a special memory for me because I remember it as Jesus Christ. Yeah, look at this timing. So but Kennison was a guy where you just thought special talent. Brilliant. And and pre- all the bells in the whistles. Yeah, it's actually like the comic is stuck with me. He only played once. I still remember as so many of his bits really vividly because he was writing while he was there. I mean, we were next door to a doughnut shop on Chestnut Street at the time. And then the next night he comes in and he goes, I don't go to donut shops late at night because it's always that one guy behind the counter is 50 years old. You know, his life hasn't gone really well and I'm afraid is going to pull out of forty five from underneath the counter and go, I'm not what daddy wanted. Now I'm sitting there with a head wound in a Kroger. Yes, he's right, and Betts is live in real time. How in San Francisco, yeah. We hear all these stories. Cobbs is great. I had an incident, but I don't blame the management. Someone got a little drunk. Maybe I think we with her boyfriend got thrown out and then she came back to the girlfriend, came back to make an argument for the boyfriend. Of course, she's thrown out and then she got thrown out. But yeah, I don't think it was when I was there because I was personally throwing up most of the people. Oh, you were personally doing it? Yeah, I enjoy. It's a good job because I had a fun job. You know, the thing I hated so much about the only thing I really hated about standup was the audience. Yeah, the customers learned so much. I just it's so unbelievably disrespectful. Did you hate her as a performer? I don't hate hecklers. I, but I will. OK, there's a couple of things the person or the couple I just did show at the improv. That's like the gay couple, like 25. Just they s**t right at the edge of the stage or the couple or whatever. Just they sit right there and they're just like an ice sculpture, the entire show. And I'm like, Yeah, I get it. Not everyone's a big laugh or but then move back like, I'm tired of looking to f**king Mount Rushmore, Stonehenge here. Whenever I'm looking at, we're like, Nothing's happening. The hecklers is fun because that's interesting. It's it's something. This is the armful folder in the front. Just going to sit again. I don't blame me for not laughing, but just don't sit right against the edge, right? I think there are a number of comics have the same complaint. They don't even care about the heckler, they care about this guy. But I immediately call that person out, like, did you know you were coming to a comedy show tonight or why are you here? Just found out I got cancer? Yeah, yeah. What happened here today? I don't feel like it's an indictment on you as a performer as well. So it's not that they're not. Well, sometimes like, you know, when you don't get invited to a party, right? And then your first impulse is like, f**k that person I'm on, I'm going to yell at them for not inviting me. And then the other part is, is they invited six or seven other people like that. Maybe there's something right? And then do I want them to tell me why you really want to take it personally if they're not laughing at you, though, do you? No, but I'm because I'm sort of like, Look, here's what I don't like. Look when. When you're at an event like some corporate event or something and they go, her bottle stands sold the most commercial real estate this company in history two years ago. And people just sort of clap. I just clap to, you know, it's like I look at the person who's not clapping, it just f**king clapping. That's what people are doing. Yes. Just tell your face. You know what I mean? Look, if you're sitting ringside at a comedy show, you just say that just kind of smirk, yes. Or knowing nod or leave once a while. Not so much. I went to a showcase in L.A. or anywhere. I would always ask the owner, Sit me in the back. I want to be right because I'm looking at the show through a different set. Absolutely. I'm looking at the show through Critical said you're not a face, and it's only when I really like someone like hit the first five minutes. I feel that I can calm down and relax and enjoy the show. But, you know, I got stacks of tapes and then eventually CDs and stuff like they would sit on my desk till I finally had, OK, I'll go through them and you're 30 seconds in the beginning, your your two minutes, then later a minute. Then when you see some guy fumbling with the mic stand and you just call your doctor. Yeah, who are you wrong about? I actually, you know, I had one club 52 weeks of the year, so it was more of a case of me missing the boat as opposed to being wrong because I don't. I just, you know, especially when the club was smaller. I will admit I was a comedy snob and I had certain kind of comics. I wanted my audience. I was trying to build an audience that felt completely safe going to the club week in and week out, even when they didn't know who the performer was. They just knew the caliber of comics that we had at the club, so they'd be willing to. If they didn't know who Brian Regan was, they'd come down and see Brian Regan. And that was the goal was to do that. So it was more of a it was more of a thing of missing. You know, I miss people I just didn't think either fit in, right? But there was, I would say, there was one time where I was where I had a comic named John McDonald Guy, good comic out of Canada. He was signed by Rollins and Jaffe. I thought this guy was on the fast, fast track to become, you know, pretty famous. And or I could have booked Jon Stewart, and I chose the Robin Jaffe backed comic instead of Jon Stewart. But then, you know, Jon Stewart probably would play the club like two or three times. And you know, Jon Stewart, yeah, I would have loved to have had him at the club and to meet them and see him live. But, you know, I can't I can't book everybody. No, of course not as a comedian and people in the doc are talking about you being funnier than a lot of the comedians. And as a former comedian, did you ever did you give people punch stuff up? Did you give them a couple of Bobby Slayton a bit that he ended up doing on The Tonight Show in front of Johnny Carson's bowl of comedy? Yeah. Oh yeah, yeah. Because I had my act about the West Side story. You know, being a really good movie, you know, kind of on the fictional side, like a white guy goes into Spanish Harlem at midnight, screamed at the top of his lungs, Maria and one girl comes to the window out and he did that on The Tonight Show. Yeah. God, what year was that? That was God. That was in nineteen eighty six, I think 86 or 87. So I was with Carson. Carson and Carson got a good record. Hey, Charles, take it. That's pretty damn good, though. Yeah? Yes, I got vicariously. I got to have a joke. Be on that tonight. Did you find that most comedians were receptive to like I was? Watch your act that maybe you could tweak this a little? I think, yeah. And Stewart, or basically, I, you know, the really good comics I left alone because they're they're amazing, but they you know where I would stop them is when I thought they were doing a bit that was kind of beneath them. Or, you know, they were they were here. The joke was here, Hey, you don't really need to do that. Or, you know, the thing I really encourage people, especially people like Jim Carrey. When Jim Carrey played the club the very first time, I was like, Dude, this is your gymnasium. You could do no wrong here because I know you know how to get back. If you go off on a weird path. No, no. You know how to get back to the audience. So I just said, do whatever the f**k you want. This is your house. It's your stage. You got my permission to go for it and everybody else. I would just tell young comics, especially. I would always tell them, Look, be yourself, because nobody can take that away from you if you're doing material and it's getting stolen. You know, if you're doing material and somebody you know, Carly Simon C is taking it, well, most likely he's taking it because it's a hack bet, because it's a it's not really. It's something you came up with. Really? Yeah. Yeah, it's not really. It's an idea you had when I was on the plane when. You weren't on the plane, what didn't happen to your. It's not a personal story, right? Yes. And I actually I talk comedy for a really long time and I would say exactly the same thing. If you're talking about an observational thing, something that you've seen on television, like when the Snuggie came out and everybody was making a joke. There's going to be 15 other comics, whether they stole it or not, they're going to come up with something very similar. But if you talk about something personal, if you have personal things that happened in your life, nobody can actually take that from you. You know what I mean? And I learned that the hard way to fight there is a big festival in San Francisco called Comedy Day. And I think the first one I went to. You know, Dana Carvey is on stage is doing a Star Trek bit. You know, the original series bit, you know, the the crew member who always gets killed? Yeah. And and you know, I mentioned it to another comic in the comic. He I'm sure he was busting my balls because I think you should tell, should go up to Karvy, tell him about that. He's doing your bit. So I go telling you guys, I quit. I really quit doing that like a couple of years ago because I was going to hacky, but I just brought it up because I was like, I'm like, OK, face red and slinking away. Yeah, I need to quit this. Well, I guess there's jokes that you take or steal or lift or something. And then there's jokes where we all have the same thoughts about human being. And then there's that part of you who initially you're in love with this thought. Like, I saw a sign that said, Jumbo shrimp. Yeah. Oh my got. Yeah, I got up. Yeah, I got it. And then you realize every human being that saw that sign had the exact same thought. And then you have to stop yourself, you know, and I talked about this with so many other comics. I'm sure you've all experienced that. It's like, sometimes I come up with something and I'm like, Oh my God, that's so brilliant. And then I think, has anyone else done that? Have I heard that somewhere? Because sometimes you are in your own comics so much you see other comics and you're like, Was that my idea? Did I hear someone else say that? And now I'm subconsciously, and I will literally be asking my friends, Did you have do you know anyone else who does a joke? Did you hear anybody with anybody? Because I don't want to, like, take something somebody else is doing. And Robin had a big problem with that. So, you know, with the material because it's a vacuum cleaner. I said, yeah, just kind of it was Zora absorbing. Yes, things from around you. Yes, I was going to ask you if when when the comics with the with the green, they're difficult to work with when they stop selling tickets at the level that Adam Carolla sells, when they they come off that do you wish for their rapid decline if they're not nice to you? I have only had a handful of, I think Ari Spears was a complete a*****e. He's a weird dude. He's totally homophobic. I mean, a baby on the spectrum. Yeah. And and I was begging him. It was literally stopping the show to do it. Adam and Steve thing. And I was like. And I stole from the agent who was gay, like, Dude, what are you doing? Why can't you stop this guy? And it's like. And then we had a big fight in the car as I'm taking the press, Oh, he's taking that. He's taking his act to San Francisco. I know. Say it's doing, yeah, go to Montgomery. So Aries Spears was Harry Spears is a weird dude. I will say that I've interviewed super talented guy. It's a shame because it was on mad TV. Yeah, I think. Yeah. So areas with stuff. Yeah. And but, you know, I don't really remember too many comics being really hard to do with Darwin has taken care of Harry Spears, if that's what you're asking. I think I think basically the s**t comes around because, you know, you should always try to be nice to people. But whether it was, which now leads me to like, I'm singing to Jim Carrey is sort of erratic. Maybe a little nutty, eccentric. I don't know. Like, was that his version? Regular guys, young days. No, she got he was married. He was. He was his his wife and and my ex were friends. You know who wasn't my ex at the time. But so, you know, yeah, regular regular dude is. So then it's the kind of the question is and well, you might have some insight. I think of him is strange now, but yeah, but I can and not not in a totally complimentary way, but a little bit of a head case, but also whatever. And does that just come with the excess? I mean, the money and the adulation or whatever? And and or was that always in him? But you have to keep it on the straight narrow when no one knows who you are because you can't act that way because you'll never have a career. Yeah, I would. I would have to say I would guess that, you know, that f**ks with you. It f**ks with certain people. Yeah. I mean, I was I remember thinking, especially because sometimes I'd be lucky enough to hang out with Robin and go to dinner with him and other stuff, and I'd get mad at the people coming up to the table. He would be he would be OK with it, you know? Yeah, yeah. And I would be fear I would be furious. It's like looking at the people going, you know, hey, you know, just having trying to have. Owner here in and hang out, you know, so what are you doing? But he he was fine with it, but I can't imagine for somebody who's that popular to be anywhere you go to not go anywhere, have it effect. It changes your it's like proven that it actually fame, especially at a young age, will like, change your brain. It actually changes it. But I think to your point, Adam, I think it's a little bit of both. I think there are people I've said it before. You see a lot of comics say, I'm probably one of them. People are like the more s**t they have going on offstage, they're all like f**ked up in the head, the more talented they are on stage. It's just it adds to their talent, for the most part. Unfortunately, it usually gets worse and worse and worse. Then there are some people that are just regular guys, and they hit like fame, massive fame. They're a little kooky onstage. And then eventually they start getting a little crazy. I think standup by itself as it as an art form is kind of a an art form for lunatics because you have your look what you're doing, you're going on stage trying to make a room of complete strangers laugh. Yeah. You know, with an hour for an hour or so. Yeah. With nothing else except your voice. And I don't crazy. That's really a healthy occupation choice. But I think it's also some people are so driven to some intervention. That's what they like. But I think, you know, now they have to do nothing up there, but the sled dramatic that Gallagher ever get out there. I I booked Gallagher to my shame once and I was like, Oh God, what air? I think it was like, I think it was like two thousand and three. It was like, Yeah, or or so all Gallagher you buck. I booked the original deal. Yeah, yeah, it did. When Gallagher would come into a place like cops, it just spread out the vice queen and get out to such a manic. Is that how it works? Yeah, I think I only went to one show I booked. I mean, he's there for five shows and I only went to one because I was. It's weird. You're not. No, nobody knows you booked the show. Nobody knows it's your responsibility. That guy is on stage, but my face was like beet red. It was like I was just like, so embarrassed. He was on my stage. What was he doing that causing this reaction just sucked. He's terrible. So he was a terrible comic, you know? And and that was the thing about. But that was the thing about going from Chestnut Street to cannery both smaller rooms to go into cabs where it is now at 400 seats. I went from being a guy who was booking like ninety nine percent comics that I really enjoyed high at the club to having a one or two comics a month that I was embarrassed about having at the club did. Let's drill down on Gallagher. So fascinated by him. Is it? What was the U? But you probably politically and spiritually disagree with him, but is it? Is it? Is he a bad comedian or do you just sort of like gay jokes or something where you go like, I don't like that he's doing it. But the jokes are funny now that he wasn't doing well with the audience. It is time it passed by Simon. Yeah, yeah. And it's like, That's again, if you're really, truly who you are on stage and this is sounds like I'm, you know, self-help program, if you really who you are on stage, my friend. You could be the true self and you will always grow and move forward. I've been encouraged by Rob Schneider in the past. So, yeah, if you're who you are that you'll you'll always be evolving. Yeah, as a comedian and as as obviously you're saying, like if you do a character right, then it's really in that character. Yeah, that's what I. You're not 80s comics got trapped in that whole thing. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. Bobcat Goldthwait did not want to do his character, but I still wanted him to do his character, and it's why I actually was begging him not to do it. I think we got into a fight one time when I was in the car because I was telling I and I refuse to put Bobcat on the marquee. You know, Tommy, blame a lot of comedians for sure, the dust ups. But there's a theme that emerged that was the one constant that was there for one weekend. Have somebody else go pick him up from the airport? There's a lot of fighting in the car. So what year was this? That was probably in the late 80s. So, yeah, Bob really was successful and did this character and became his bread and butter. But you thought I thought it was a trap, right? And I thought, you're going to get locked into something. You're not going to be able to get out of it until everybody sick of it. And then you got nowhere to go. Right? That's who you are. You're bobcat, right? You know what? You're Bob Goldthwait. You can be Bob. You can actually be Bob Goldthwait. Yeah, right. Any time, right? Or you can slowly maneuver into being Bob Goldthwait and stop being bobcat right now. I think Bob and Bobcat are both hilarious, and they were funny as hell. Yeah, but I also. Just felt he was it was going to be a trap for him later down the road. No, that's and I was trying to help him or convince him to take a different direction. Yeah, I I agree. I know I know Bob well, and he's now the opposite of Bobcat, which but who knows if the opposite is even the real you either. It's just not. It's as far away from that as you got. All right. Well, we're out of time, Jody and Janet commands. You can tell him what's wrong with them off the air. Yeah, he has a lot of paracelsus, lots of notes he have. I like a lot of people too. And we just haven't heard about it. Tom Sawyer, The Comedy Club Very interesting documentary with all the names from back in the day all over. Yeah, it's a funny start for interesting story, and you can get it on digital platforms and you can go to your website. Tom Sawyer Just like you think Tom Sawyer voices Tom Sawyer voices dot com. I'm going to be Jimmy's comedy club this Friday and Saturday in Las Vegas, so you can come by and say hi. And then all over the place, so come, say, Hey, I got an Echo Dot com for all that. John, Chris, you is going to be in Vegas as well. He's going to be in San Diego night, back to back. You had to pick one or the other. I say, you go with me because this show is going to be sold out. Items will be sold out. So he's playing like the enormous dome over there. Four dates you can go to John, Chris, Comedy dot com and then there's Jody Miller's got her special at the Ice House that I will definitely go to if I'm in lock out of then and not in Malibu. That is July 21st. Jodi Miller, comedy icon and until next time in San Carlos San Mahalla, you can leave us a voicemail at eight eight eight six three four one seven four four. The Adam Carolla show have recorded using road microphones. Visit Aro Decomp and our music is provided by extreme music as a. You search for tickets and involved and. And everything get. Adam Curl at our Tom. 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