The Art of Charm | Confidence | Relationship and Dating Advice | Biohacking | Productivity

Time for Fan Mail Friday, where we'll be answering your questions and dropping some knowledge and feedback to help you kick the weekend off right. Let's cut to it! In this episode: When you're a young female moving to a new city, is looking for roommates on Craigslist advisable? Thanks to Jeff McCollister (@the1hatter) for giving us a proper source for The Guy in the Glass poem we talked about last week. It was written in 1934 by Peter "Dale" Wimbrow Sr., who was not a death row inmate -- in spite of what the Internet tries to tell us. Regardless, it's still very powerful. Tipping isn't just good manners -- it's good social dynamics. If you're going to change your dietary habits, make sure it's for the right reasons and not because you were swayed by an AoC Challenge critical-thinking exercise! What's wrong with being sexy? You shouldn't start a podcast unless you don't care if people listen. Documentary of the Week: Icarus Quick shoutouts to Colin and Runa Ludthard and AoC sister Lida in Sweden! Have any questions, comments, or stories you'd like to share with us? Drop us a line at friday@theartofcharm.com! Check out Jordan's (@TheArtofCharm) other show: The Forbes List, and Jason's (@jpdef) other show: Grumpy Old Geeks. Full show notes at https://theartofcharm.com/fmf130/ Find out more about the team who makes The Art of Charm podcast here! Does your business have an Internet presence? Now save a whopping 50% on new webhosting packages here with HostGator by using coupon code CHARM! HELP US SPREAD THE WORD! If you dig the show, please subscribe in iTunes and write us a review! This is what helps us stand out from the crowd and help people find the credible advice they need. Review the show in iTunes! We rely on it! http://www.theartofcharm.com/mobilereview Stay Charming!

25:34 9/1/2017

Past Episodes

Welcome to Minisode Monday, where we kick off the week with something quick and actionable -- to make you more magnetic and effective -- that you can implement right away. Are you trying to understand the motivation behind someone's alleged actions? Here's an exercise from episode 651 guest Frank Sesno, author of Ask More: The Power of Questions to Open Doors, Uncover Solutions, and Spark Change. Let's get to it! The Cheat Sheet: As a hypothetical scenario, imagine you're in charge of prosecuting someone charged with plagiarism. Simply asking if the subject is guilty is pointless -- they've already denied it. Instead, write down ten questions that are less directly confrontational. Examples: Why would somebody possibly do something like this? Why spend time doing something like this? Who would have the resources to do something like this? What resources do you think this person might have used? Would this have been difficult to do if you had been guilty and done it? Who might have wanted to make it look like you did it? What other plausible explanations are there? Asking these kinds of questions is a great way to figure out someone's motivations as well as getting them to build a narrative for you. Coming up with these types of questions -- even if you don't end up needing to ask them -- helps you think inside, outside, and underneath for a more complete picture of any scenario. To learn more about social dynamics and productivity hacks, take the Art of Charm Challenge by clicking here, or text AOC to 38470. Also be sure to check out our Social Capital Intensive here! Let us know about how you put today's Minisode Monday into practice! Tweet with @TheArtofCharm in your response or write to Jordan directly: jordan@jordanharbinger.com (he actually reads everything)! Full show notes at https://theartofcharm.com/podcast-episodes/minisode-monday-80-ask-questions-uncover-motivation/ Find out more about the team who makes The Art of Charm podcast here! Take the Art of Charm Challenge by clicking here, or text AOC to 38470. We'll take you step by step to becoming better at making personal and professional connections, becoming a better networker, increasing your personal social capital and charisma. This is for both men and women! Does your business have an Internet presence? Now save a whopping 50% on new webhosting packages here with HostGator by using coupon code CHARM! Listen to The Art of Charm, Adam and Dr. Drew Show, and hundreds of your favorite podcasts with the free PodcastOne app (on iOS and Android) here! HELP US SPREAD THE WORD! If you dig the show, please subscribe in iTunes and write us a review! This is what helps us stand out from the crowd and help people find the credible advice they need. Review the show in iTunes! We rely on it! http://www.theartofcharm.com/mobilereview Stay Charming!
03:49 11/20/2017
Time for Fan Mail Friday, where we'll be answering your questions and dropping some knowledge and feedback to help you kick the weekend off right. Let's cut to it! In this episode: What do you say when you meet a celebrity -- without being awkward? Is it still called imposter syndrome when you're an imposter by design? How do you tell a loved one their behavior is freaking you out? How do you help a sibling whose bad behavior is having a negative impact on the whole family? Should you have to take the lead when it comes to keeping in touch with family? Listener advice for people who need to collect from chronic check bouncers. Quick shoutouts to Teiki Kimball and Lena, and Korhan and Amber! Have any questions, comments, or stories you'd like to share with us? Drop us a line at friday@theartofcharm.com! Connect with Jordan on Twitter at @TheArtofCharm and Instagram at @jordanharbinger, and check out Jason's (@jpdef) other show: Grumpy Old Geeks. Full show notes at https://theartofcharm.com/fmf141/ Find out more about the team who makes The Art of Charm podcast here! Learn over 500 subjects (no tests or homework!) at The Great Courses Plus -- The Art of Charm listeners get one month free here! By The Book is half reality show, half self-help podcast, and one wild social experiment. Join comedian Jolenta Greenberg and her skeptical friend Kristen Meinzer as they live by the rules of a different self-help book each episode to figure out which ones might actually be life changing. Check it out here or wherever you listen to podcasts. Does your business have an Internet presence? Now save a whopping 50% on new webhosting packages here with HostGator by using coupon code CHARM! Take the Art of Charm Challenge by clicking here, or text AOC to 38470. We'll take you step by step to becoming better at making personal and professional connections, becoming a better networker, increasing your personal social capital and charisma. This is for both men and women! HELP US SPREAD THE WORD! If you dig the show, please subscribe in iTunes and write us a review! This is what helps us stand out from the crowd and help people find the credible advice they need. Review the show in iTunes! We rely on it! http://www.theartofcharm.com/mobilereview Stay Charming!
39:33 11/17/2017
Feel like your accomplishments are unearned, you aren't as good as people think, and you'll be found out any moment? Here's how to stop imposter syndrome. The Cheat Sheet: What is imposter syndrome? What are the causes of imposter syndrome? How can we recognize imposter syndrome when it arises? How can we shift our mindset if we find ourselves succumbing to imposter syndrome? What do we have to gain by shedding imposter syndrome? And so much more... Full show notes at https://theartofcharm.com/670/ Find out more about the team who makes The Art of Charm podcast here! Four Sigmatic mushroom coffee with lion's mane gives you the boost of coffee with half the caffeine. Try Four Sigmatic's AoC coffee bundle here, and use code CHARM at checkout for free shipping! Whether you're a lady or a gent, you don't need to know what MicroModal fabric is to enjoy the comfort of MeUndies; you just need to wear them -- support this show (and yourself) with MeUndies here for 20% off! As security breaches make headlines with increasing frequency, is your identity protected? Go to LifeLock.com or call 1-800-LIFELOCK and use promo code FORBES for 10% off your LifeLock membership! Does your business have an Internet presence? Now save a whopping 50% on new webhosting packages here with HostGator by using coupon code CHARM! Free yourself from typing notes, reports, and documents by going with the transcriptionists we trust here at AoC: TranscriptionOutsourcing.net -- 99% or higher accuracy guaranteed! HELP US SPREAD THE WORD! If you dig the show, please subscribe in iTunes and write us a review! This is what helps us stand out from the crowd and help people find the credible advice they need. Review the show in iTunes! We rely on it! http://www.theartofcharm.com/mobilereview Stay Charming!
38:00 11/16/2017
Scott Adams (@ScottAdamsSays) of Dilbert fame revisits us to discuss his new book Win Bigly: Persuasion in a World Where Facts Don't Matter. "Nobody ever won an argument with an analogy." -Scott Adams The Cheat Sheet: Is Scott Adams a Trump supporter? People don't use facts to make decisions. They use emotion. Learn the three types of persuaders and how they operate. See how master persuaders move the topic to things they understand and can dominate (regardless of facts and details). Find out why master persuasion is effective even if the subject or target sees the technique. And so much more... Full show notes at https://theartofcharm.com/669/ Find out more about the team who makes The Art of Charm podcast here! DesignCrowd helps startups and small businesses crowdsource custom graphics, logos, Web design -- even tattoo designs! Check out DesignCrowd.com/Charm for a special $100 VIP offer for our listeners or enter the discount code CHARM when posting a project. Rhone makes gear for the modern man who demands modern style, comfort, and quality. Click here or go to rhone.com and enter promo code CHARM at checkout to get 20% off your first purchase! Does your business have an Internet presence? Now save a whopping 50% on new webhosting packages here with HostGator by using coupon code CHARM! Stocks $5 a trade. Options 50 per contract plus $5 per trade. Futures $1.50 per contract, per side. Ready to make your move? Come to TradeStation.com/Charm! CastBox introduces an in-audio search capability that offers a brand new way to search for podcasts you may love based on words or topics. Download CastBox for iOS or Android now to try it out for yourself! Free yourself from typing notes, reports, and documents by going with the transcriptionists we trust here at AoC: TranscriptionOutsourcing.net -- 99% or higher accuracy guaranteed! HELP US SPREAD THE WORD! If you dig the show, please subscribe in iTunes and write us a review! This is what helps us stand out from the crowd and help people find the credible advice they need. Review the show in iTunes! We rely on it! http://www.theartofcharm.com/mobilereview Stay Charming!
01:09:20 11/14/2017
Welcome to Minisode Monday, where we kick off the week with something quick and actionable -- to make you more magnetic and effective -- that you can implement right away. Finish: Give Yourself the Gift of Done author Jon Acuff rejoins us (hear his most recent full episode here) to discuss why he's more productive on an airplane and how he recreates the conditions to make him as productive when he's home. Let's get to it! The Cheat Sheet: From feedback and personal experience, Jon Acuff noticed that we tend to be more productive when we're traveling. Since we can't travel all the time, he was determined to recreate the conditions that influence this behavior. Here's what he came up with. Because of physical restrictions, you can only bring a limited amount of work. White noise helps you focus. Limited Internet connectivity keeps you from unnecessary distractions. Focus-driving deadlines result from breaks in the routine (waiting in the terminal, boarding, flying, landing, waiting to deboard). These work roughly like the Pomodoro Technique. Nobody knows you; nobody bothers you. To learn more about social dynamics and productivity hacks, take the Art of Charm Challenge by clicking here, or text AOC to 38470. Also be sure to check out our Social Capital Intensive here! Let us know how you put today's Minisode Monday into practice! Tweet with @TheArtofCharm in your response or write to Jordan directly: jordan@theartofcharm.com (he actually reads everything)! Full show notes at https://theartofcharm.com/podcast-episodes/minisode-monday-79-productive-airplanes-not/ Find out more about the team who makes The Art of Charm podcast here! Take the Art of Charm Challenge by clicking here, or text AOC to 38470. We'll take you step by step to becoming better at making personal and professional connections, becoming a better networker, increasing your personal social capital and charisma. This is for both men and women! Does your business have an Internet presence? Now save a whopping 50% on new webhosting packages here with HostGator by using coupon code CHARM! Listen to The Art of Charm, Starving for Attention with Richard Blais, and hundreds of your favorite podcasts with the free PodcastOne app (on iOS and Android) here! HELP US SPREAD THE WORD! If you dig the show, please subscribe in iTunes and write us a review! This is what helps us stand out from the crowd and help people find the credible advice they need. Review the show in iTunes! We rely on it! http://www.theartofcharm.com/mobilereview Stay Charming!
08:22 11/13/2017
Time for Fan Mail Friday, where we'll be answering your questions and dropping some knowledge and feedback to help you kick the weekend off right. If you're new to The Art of Charm Podcast, this isn't a great place to start. Most of our content is more in-depth and longer format. Listen to recent guests Jon Acuff and Tom Bilyeu for a better idea of our regular programming. Also make sure to check out our Best Of picks or the Fundamentals Toolbox episodes. There, we've got the fundamentals of body language and nonverbal communication, attraction, negotiation, networking, and everything else we teach here at The Art of Charm. Let's cut to it! In this episode: Is there anything you find useful that other people just don't get? What are your options for maintaining sanity when you're living with a messy significant other? Self-help isn't selfish, but you might want to put the brakes on any relationships until you're standing on firmer ground. Convincing your company's chief investor that it's time to pivot is all the more difficult when he happens to be your father. No kid is responsible for an adult's decision to use drugs. Repeated for emphasis: No kid is responsible for an adult's decision to use drugs. Some listener advice for the guy from FMF 134 who's dating high-maintenance Mercedes. How do you avoid becoming passive backdrop furniture in a group conversation? Is there ever any upside to getting sucked into your coworker's personal drama on the job? Documentary of the Week: anything about The Great Barrier Reef. Quick shoutouts to Andy from Luxembourg and Katie Couric! Have any questions, comments, or stories you'd like to share with us? Drop us a line at friday@theartofcharm.com! Connect with Jordan on Twitter at @TheArtofCharm and Instagram at @jordanharbinger, and check out Jason's (@jpdef) other show: Grumpy Old Geeks. Full show notes at https://theartofcharm.com/fmf140/ Find out more about the team who makes The Art of Charm podcast here! Does your business have an Internet presence? Now save a whopping 50% on new webhosting packages here with HostGator by using coupon code CHARM! Need to promote yourself? Do it right by picking up Book Yourself Solid: The Fastest, Easiest, and Most Reliable System for Getting More Clients Than You Can Handle Even if You Hate Marketing and Selling by Michael Port! Take the Art of Charm Challenge by clicking here, or text AOC to 38470. We'll take you step by step to becoming better at making personal and professional connections, becoming a better networker, increasing your personal social capital and charisma. This is for both men and women! HELP US SPREAD THE WORD! If you dig the show, please subscribe in iTunes and write us a review! This is what helps us stand out from the crowd and help people find the credible advice they need. Review the show in iTunes! We rely on it! http://www.theartofcharm.com/mobilereview Stay Charming!
40:43 11/10/2017
Jon Acuff (@jonacuff) returns to the show to discuss his new book Finish: Give Yourself the Gift of Done. "If culture's doing its job, you shouldn't reward middle. You should reward finish." -Jon Acuff The Cheat Sheet: Why are only eight percent of new year's resolutions realized? (Incidentally, that's the same percentage of applicants accepted to Juilliard.) The harm perfectionism causes and what we can do to navigate through it. The Planning Fallacy and how it causes overachievers to fail before even beginning. Strategic Incompetence: why you should deliberately be terrible at some things. Secret Rules: what they are, how they're made, and how these invisible scripts affect our lives (and what we can do about it). And so much more... Full show notes at https://theartofcharm.com/668/ Find out more about the team who makes The Art of Charm podcast here! Four Sigmatic mushroom coffee with lion's mane gives you the boost of coffee with half the caffeine. Try Four Sigmatic's AoC coffee bundle here, and use code CHARM at checkout for free shipping! Are you trying to hire the right person for your business, but the best candidates keep slipping away? Let ZipRecruiter -- the fastest way to hire great people -- help you screen only the best here! As security breaches make headlines with increasing frequency, is your identity protected? Go to LifeLock.com or call 1-800-LIFELOCK and use promo code FORBES for 10% off your LifeLock membership! CastBox introduces an in-audio search capability that offers a brand new way to search for podcasts you may love based on words or topics. Download CastBox for iOS or Android now to try it out for yourself! Need a podcast that will help you 'begin living and thinking smarter not harder?' Check out Dexter Guff is Smarter Than You (And You Can Be Too) -- subscribe now to get your ears on Dexter's mouth! Does your business have an Internet presence? Now save a whopping 50% on new webhosting packages here with HostGator by using coupon code CHARM! Free yourself from typing notes, reports, and documents by going with the transcriptionists we trust here at AoC: TranscriptionOutsourcing.net -- 99% or higher accuracy guaranteed! HELP US SPREAD THE WORD! If you dig the show, please subscribe in iTunes and write us a review! This is what helps us stand out from the crowd and help people find the credible advice they need. Review the show in iTunes! We rely on it! http://www.theartofcharm.com/mobilereview Stay Charming!
01:06:11 11/9/2017
Tom Bilyeu (@TomBilyeu) is a co-founder of Quest Nutrition, co-founder of media company Impact Theory, and host of the accompanying Impact Theory podcast. The Cheat Sheet: Why the fastest way to learn is to teach. Developing a growth mindset (per previous guest Carol Dweck) to avoid getting stuck doing one thing forever. Escaping the depression of feeling like a talentless hack. Why limiting his prospects made Tom feel better about himself in the short run -- and how he broke away from being "The King of Remedial Jobs." How do we preserve a positive belief system in the face of what looks like contrary evidence? And so much more... Full show notes at https://theartofcharm.com/667/ Find out more about the team who makes The Art of Charm podcast here! As the holidays approach, where can you snag a family gift pack of meat for only $49.99? Go to omahasteaks.com, enter code ART in the search bar, and get a 75% savings for being an AoC listener! Learn over 500 subjects (no tests or homework!) at The Great Courses Plus -- The Art of Charm listeners get one month free here! Rhone makes gear for the modern man who demands modern style, comfort, and quality. Click here or go to rhone.com and enter promo code CHARM at checkout to get 20% off your first purchase! CastBox introduces an in-audio search capability that offers a brand new way to search for podcasts you may love based on words or topics. Download CastBox for iOS or Android now to try it out for yourself! Does your business have an Internet presence? Now save a whopping 50% on new webhosting packages here with HostGator by using coupon code CHARM! Free yourself from typing notes, reports, and documents by going with the transcriptionists we trust here at AoC: TranscriptionOutsourcing.net -- 99% or higher accuracy guaranteed! HELP US SPREAD THE WORD! If you dig the show, please subscribe in iTunes and write us a review! This is what helps us stand out from the crowd and help people find the credible advice they need. Review the show in iTunes! We rely on it! http://www.theartofcharm.com/mobilereview Stay Charming!
58:32 11/7/2017
Welcome to Minisode Monday, where we kick off the week with something quick and actionable -- to make you more magnetic and effective -- that you can implement right away. Marsha Shandur of Yes Yes Marsha rejoins us (check out her full episode here) with ways we can harness emotions for powerful storytelling -- and what to leave out for better effect. Let's get to it! The Cheat Sheet: Telling a good story well literally floods your listener's brain with dopamine (which helps with information processing) and oxytocin (which makes them trust you more). Contrary to popular belief, it's not usually the addition of too many details that ruins good storytelling; it's not including enough of the right details. What are the right details? How living through the story made you feel -- the emotions the experience generated. As we share the story with others, tuning them in to these emotions allows them to better relate. Beginning a story with an action sequence (as Marsha demonstrates) places an information gap that helps build tension and keeps people paying attention. Internal monologue describing how events made us feel and naming the emotions experienced keep the listener hooked. Pinpointing where in the body we felt these emotions adds a visceral element that makes the story even more relatable. No spoilers -- as with our favorite television shows, we want tension to build without the ending being given away. This week, practice telling your friends short true stories in which you include how you felt when you were living them. Make sure to check out Marsha's page for AoC listeners with an exercise and extra help by which you can learn to harness emotions for powerful storytelling! Find it here. Download episode worksheet here. (Coming soon!) To learn more about social dynamics and productivity hacks, take the Art of Charm Challenge by clicking here, or text AOC to 38470. Also be sure to check out our Social Capital Intensive here! Let us know about how you put today's Minisode Monday into practice! Tweet with @TheArtofCharm in your response or write to Jordan directly: jordan@theartofcharm.com (he actually reads everything)! Full show notes at https://theartofcharm.com/podcast-episodes/minisode-monday-78-harnessing-emotions-for-powerful-storytelling/ Find out more about the team who makes The Art of Charm podcast here! Take the Art of Charm Challenge by clicking here, or text AOC to 38470. We'll take you step by step to becoming better at making personal and professional connections, becoming a better networker, increasing your personal social capital and charisma. This is for both men and women! Does your business have an Internet presence? Now save a whopping 50% on new webhosting packages here with HostGator by using coupon code CHARM! Listen to The Art of Charm, Dogma Debate, and hundreds of your favorite podcasts with the free PodcastOne app (on iOS and Android) here! HELP US SPREAD THE WORD! If you dig the show, please subscribe in iTunes and write us a review! This is what helps us stand out from the crowd and help people find the credible advice they need. Review the show in iTunes! We rely on it! http://www.theartofcharm.com/mobilereview Stay Charming!
13:00 11/6/2017
Time for Fan Mail Friday, where we'll be answering your questions and dropping some knowledge and feedback to help you kick the weekend off right. If you're new to The Art of Charm Podcast, this isn't a great place to start. Most of our content is more in-depth and longer format. Listen to recent guests Bob Sutton and Aubrey Marcus for a better idea of our regular programming. Also make sure to check out our Best Of picks or the Fundamentals Toolbox episodes. There, we've got the fundamentals of body language and nonverbal communication, attraction, negotiation, networking, and everything else we teach here at The Art of Charm. Let's cut to it! In this episode: So you're having a challenge with a new relationship -- your soon-to-be mother-in-law. How can you make it right before the big day? How do you deal with a person who is constantly asking for favors but has yet to provide any real value in return? If you're doing everything you're meant to be doing and your life has improved since giving up alcohol, is there a problem with the vice you've chosen to replace it? Some listener advice for the Lost Corpsman from FMF #135 -- specifically for his struggles with PTSD, depression, and self-treatment with alcohol. How much eye contact is too much eye contact? Quick shoutout to Jeremy, The Self-Improvement Forester! Have any questions, comments, or stories you'd like to share with us? Drop us a line at friday@theartofcharm.com! Connect with Jordan on Twitter at @TheArtofCharm, and check out Jason's (@jpdef) other show: Grumpy Old Geeks. Full show notes at https://theartofcharm.com/fmf139/ Find out more about the team who makes The Art of Charm podcast here! Does your business have an Internet presence? Now save a whopping 50% on new webhosting packages here with HostGator by using coupon code CHARM! Castbox introduces an in-audio search capability that offers a brand new way to search for podcasts you may love based on words or topics. Download CastBox for iOS or Android now to try it out for yourself! Need a podcast that will help you 'begin living and thinking smarter not harder?' Check out Dexter Guff is Smarter Than You (And You Can Be Too) -- subscribe now to get your ears on Dexter's mouth! Take the Art of Charm Challenge by clicking here, or text AOC to 38470. We'll take you step by step to becoming better at making personal and professional connections, becoming a better networker, increasing your personal social capital and charisma. This is for both men and women! HELP US SPREAD THE WORD! If you dig the show, please subscribe in iTunes and write us a review! This is what helps us stand out from the crowd and help people find the credible advice they need. Review the show in iTunes! We rely on it! http://www.theartofcharm.com/mobilereview Stay Charming!
41:35 11/3/2017

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